It is time to sound the alarms once again. As many of you know, Darrell Gilyard is currently facing his first public Paternity suit, see https://showcase.duvalclerk.com/SearchForCases.aspx A brave woman has come forward to seek damages against him. There are many others and maybe they will gain courage to do the same. These are his children, they deserve to be provided for. It is time he has to answer for some of these lives he has left in ruins. These precious children deserve so much more than this.
In the meantime, he is resuming life as if nothing has happened. Continuing to preach and act as if he has done no wrong. Not once has he apologized to any of his victims. He has not acknowledged a need for help. He has not even taken time off to seek help. The sad thing is that he continues to find churches that welcome him into their pulpits.
The latest church is out of his hometown of Palatka, Fl. He is scheduled to preach their as early as this Sunday. Rumor has it that he may even be being looked at to eventually replace the current Pastor. Can you believe it? The current Pastor is Frederick Demps. The church is:
Calvary Missionary Baptist Church
Pastor Frederick Demps
322 N. 10th Street
386-328-4420
There is so much I would like to say here, but I truly feel my job is only to alert you and keep this in the spotlight. If it is left in the dark, as we know, evil is allowed to prosper there.
Lord, please help us keep evil out of our churches, protect the innocent. Holy Spirit, trouble the souls of those who are allowing this. Let them not be able to be settled in their Spirits. Lord, deliver this nation from this corruption that is taking over our churches and leaving in its wake tattered souls and lives. Church is your home Lord, we desire to protect your temple God. Let us glorify you in all of our ways and in our worship. We will not allow this evil to take over, we will fight the good fight. Give us wisdom, lead us and guide is in your precious and HOLY name, Jesus. Pray people, this is not over yet.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Records Have Been Released
The records have now been released for the upcoming court case. This has been long awaited.
It will now be exposed as you will read in the article below.
Notice Hank Coxe statement in the article. Doesn't sound like he has much of a defense to offer up.
Hank Coxe, said: "We look forward to getting to the courtroom to see if this information can be reconciled with other information we have."
Sounds like the information speaks for itself to me.
Read the Florida Times Union article here:
http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/080608/met_314190357.shtml
Also the Local News reports here:
http://www.cbs47.com/content/topstories/story.aspx?content_id=2da1ac73-46f3-4ad0-a2b3-b779ea28c483
http://www.news4jax.com/news/17108071/detail.html
It will now be exposed as you will read in the article below.
Notice Hank Coxe statement in the article. Doesn't sound like he has much of a defense to offer up.
Hank Coxe, said: "We look forward to getting to the courtroom to see if this information can be reconciled with other information we have."
Sounds like the information speaks for itself to me.
Read the Florida Times Union article here:
http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/080608/met_314190357.shtml
Also the Local News reports here:
http://www.cbs47.com/content/topstories/story.aspx?content_id=2da1ac73-46f3-4ad0-a2b3-b779ea28c483
http://www.news4jax.com/news/17108071/detail.html
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Breaking the Silence
Anonymous said...
I am a deacon at Shiloh and I want to repent and confess. I am not the head deacon, so there was only so much I could do. We knew what DG was doing with the grown women. What surprised us was the children. The trouble at first was DG knew what some of the deacons were doing, so we couldn't talk. If DG had talked about what some of the leaders were doing, it could have destroyed some of their marriages. So we left him alone. Nobody ever thought it would come to this. He was bringing in the bacon. We left him alone. I would have been ostracized had I said anything. I am truly sorry to all the women who can't even acknowledge that they were victims. I am sorry for being silent when I should have spoken. I never thought so many people would get hurt.
July 22, 2008 9:20 AM
I am a deacon at Shiloh and I want to repent and confess. I am not the head deacon, so there was only so much I could do. We knew what DG was doing with the grown women. What surprised us was the children. The trouble at first was DG knew what some of the deacons were doing, so we couldn't talk. If DG had talked about what some of the leaders were doing, it could have destroyed some of their marriages. So we left him alone. Nobody ever thought it would come to this. He was bringing in the bacon. We left him alone. I would have been ostracized had I said anything. I am truly sorry to all the women who can't even acknowledge that they were victims. I am sorry for being silent when I should have spoken. I never thought so many people would get hurt.
July 22, 2008 9:20 AM
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
General Comments
Upon reader requests, I am creating this spot for general comments and questions. A place that will remain at the top for those of you wishing to leave comments in a fresh place sure to be viewed.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Research - A chance to make a difference
One of the objectives of this site is to draw awareness and find a way to make changes to this problem attacking the church today. It is a much larger problem than many of us are aware of.
God bless you and your efforts, Diana!
Diana Garland Ph.D. is the Dean of Baylor School of Social Work. Diana has recently been given a grant to further study this problem and find ways to implement changes and train churches in this matter. She needs help and also our prayers. Whenever you are attempting to better the church for the Kingdom, you are also going to be under attack spiritually and will need prayer warriors covering you.
I asked Diana if I could make a post here advertising her research and the need for help. In a brief summary, this is what she needs:
"The research focuses on persons victimized as adults—men and women. I am seeking survivors whose victimization ended in the past two years. I also am interested in congregational leaders who were affected by CSA in a congregation where they were serving. And I want to interview perpetrators. If you have contacts like that, I would welcome them. I am attaching the press release about the project, if you want to post it. Many thanks! Diana"
This is the full press release:
April 29, 2008
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
Clergy Sexual Abuse Research of Diana Garland Awarded $200,000 by Ford Foundation
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
Clergy Sexual Abuse Research of Diana Garland Awarded $200,000 by Ford Foundation
When Anne Beiler lost her 18-month-old daughter in an accidental death, her trusted pastor encouraged her to come to him for counseling. Desperate and grieving, she did, only to have him involve her in a sexual relationship. *
“Their relationship was not an affair,” says Diana Garland, dean of the Baylor University School of Social Work. “He abused his power. She was a church member already in crisis who sought the care of her religious leader.”
Garland has received a $200,000 grant from the Ford Foundation to conduct the first national research on clergy sexual abuse. The project will develop a strategy for preventing clergy sexual abuse based on public education and the development of community and congregational strategies that will involve institutional policies and practices.
“Our faith communities have been dismayed to learn that trusted spiritual leaders have used their roles to abuse children and that others covered up the abuse and thus allowed it to continue,” said Garland, noted social scientist and author of the award-winning Family Ministry (InterVarsity Press, 1999), Sacred Stories of Ordinary Families (Jossey-Bass, 2003)and co-author of Flawed Families of the Bible (Brazos Press, 2007).
“This project intends to shed light on the problem of spiritual leaders who abuse their power with adults and how that abuse can be prevented. The goal is to strengthen congregations with protective policies and structures that take human vulnerabilities seriously,” she said.
The immediate goals of the project are to determine the prevalence of clergy sexual abuse of adults; to teach religious leaders, congregants and the general public that sexual activity between a religious leader and a congregant cannot be considered consensual; to communicate to survivors and their families that they are not alone and that they deserve support and professional care; to provide promising policy and prevention strategies; and to communicate that the church can respond to ethical violations with compassionate care for the vulnerable as its major focus instead of institutional self protection.
“Because of the spiritual power of the clergy role, this form of abuse has the potential for even greater devastation of victims and communities than abuse of power in employment or educational settings,” said Marie Fortune, Faith Trust Institute and an expert in the field of clergy sexual abuse. Clinical reports indicate high rates of post-traumatic stress disorder, other anxiety disorders, depression, physical illness and suicide.
Questions for Garland’s study are included in the General Social Survey 2008, one of the most rigorous and respected surveys in existence. The GSS is conducted by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago every two years. It is the only full-probability, personal-interview survey designed to monitor social characteristics and attitudes in the United States.
The total sample size of the GSS will be approximately 3,500 with a representative sample of English- and Spanish-speaking adults in the nation. Complete anonymity of respondents is guaranteed. Data from the survey will be delivered in January 2009. Research consultants for the project include Mark Chaves of Duke University and an advisory committee.
Garland will further interview members of at least 30 Christian and Jewish congregations directly affected by clergy sexual abuse and at least 12 individuals with first-hand knowledge of such abuse.
“We anticipate, based on case studies and anecdotal reports, that the opportunity to contribute to a study on this topic will be healing and empowering for survivors and their families and congregations,” Garland said.
“Every attempt will be made to give them opportunity to tell their story in ways in which they feel comfortable and that their courage in participating in this project is respected,” she said.
The Ford Foundation, chartered in 1936, is committed to strengthening democratic values, reducing poverty and injustice, promoting international cooperation and advancing human achievement. Annually, it receives some 40,000 proposals and awards 2,000 grants. The foundation has distributed more than $15 billion worldwide. For more information, visit http://www.fordfound.org/.
Garland previously had received $31,000 combined funding for this project from the Baptist General Convention of Texas and the JES Edwards Foundation of Fort Worth, Texas.
“Their relationship was not an affair,” says Diana Garland, dean of the Baylor University School of Social Work. “He abused his power. She was a church member already in crisis who sought the care of her religious leader.”
Garland has received a $200,000 grant from the Ford Foundation to conduct the first national research on clergy sexual abuse. The project will develop a strategy for preventing clergy sexual abuse based on public education and the development of community and congregational strategies that will involve institutional policies and practices.
“Our faith communities have been dismayed to learn that trusted spiritual leaders have used their roles to abuse children and that others covered up the abuse and thus allowed it to continue,” said Garland, noted social scientist and author of the award-winning Family Ministry (InterVarsity Press, 1999), Sacred Stories of Ordinary Families (Jossey-Bass, 2003)and co-author of Flawed Families of the Bible (Brazos Press, 2007).
“This project intends to shed light on the problem of spiritual leaders who abuse their power with adults and how that abuse can be prevented. The goal is to strengthen congregations with protective policies and structures that take human vulnerabilities seriously,” she said.
The immediate goals of the project are to determine the prevalence of clergy sexual abuse of adults; to teach religious leaders, congregants and the general public that sexual activity between a religious leader and a congregant cannot be considered consensual; to communicate to survivors and their families that they are not alone and that they deserve support and professional care; to provide promising policy and prevention strategies; and to communicate that the church can respond to ethical violations with compassionate care for the vulnerable as its major focus instead of institutional self protection.
“Because of the spiritual power of the clergy role, this form of abuse has the potential for even greater devastation of victims and communities than abuse of power in employment or educational settings,” said Marie Fortune, Faith Trust Institute and an expert in the field of clergy sexual abuse. Clinical reports indicate high rates of post-traumatic stress disorder, other anxiety disorders, depression, physical illness and suicide.
Questions for Garland’s study are included in the General Social Survey 2008, one of the most rigorous and respected surveys in existence. The GSS is conducted by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago every two years. It is the only full-probability, personal-interview survey designed to monitor social characteristics and attitudes in the United States.
The total sample size of the GSS will be approximately 3,500 with a representative sample of English- and Spanish-speaking adults in the nation. Complete anonymity of respondents is guaranteed. Data from the survey will be delivered in January 2009. Research consultants for the project include Mark Chaves of Duke University and an advisory committee.
Garland will further interview members of at least 30 Christian and Jewish congregations directly affected by clergy sexual abuse and at least 12 individuals with first-hand knowledge of such abuse.
“We anticipate, based on case studies and anecdotal reports, that the opportunity to contribute to a study on this topic will be healing and empowering for survivors and their families and congregations,” Garland said.
“Every attempt will be made to give them opportunity to tell their story in ways in which they feel comfortable and that their courage in participating in this project is respected,” she said.
The Ford Foundation, chartered in 1936, is committed to strengthening democratic values, reducing poverty and injustice, promoting international cooperation and advancing human achievement. Annually, it receives some 40,000 proposals and awards 2,000 grants. The foundation has distributed more than $15 billion worldwide. For more information, visit http://www.fordfound.org/.
Garland previously had received $31,000 combined funding for this project from the Baptist General Convention of Texas and the JES Edwards Foundation of Fort Worth, Texas.
* Twist of faith: The story of Anne Beiler, founder of Auntie Anne’s Pretzels. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 2008.
END
END
Contact: Diana Garland, Dean, Baylor School of Social Work
254-710-6223 Diana_Garland@baylor.edu
God bless you and your efforts, Diana!
Monday, May 19, 2008
Still Fighting
Just wanted to clarify and update something. I have been asked recently by several people if I am dropping out with regards to the Darrell Gilyard scandal, the answer is a most definite no. I have been side tracked with a busy household these last few weeks adjusting to having a new addition and caring for my 5 other children. However, I will see this through to the very end and am still very concerned about all of the potential victims still out there.
The very fact that he is already involved with another speaking position at another church is the very reason I originally titled this blog "Let's stop Pastor Darrell Gilyard together". I had already seen from past experience with him, how easily he moves from church to church even though he is caught in horrible acts. We need to make sure that we do not fall asleep to the wicked ways of man and stay alert to the things God would call us to do to prevent the plans of the devil to take hold, especially in our churches. When something is going on in our church that is not of God and does not line up with scripture, and we sit back and just allow it to take hold, we are becoming in a sense luke warm and bear some responsibility.
So, this is far from over. We are in the waiting stages before the trial. Not much is happening to speak of, but we need to still pray over the case and over any young women that would come into his path while he is free right now as well.
I do have a new email address as well if any of you feel the need to contact me for any reason, thefamilycircus8@gmail.com
Thank you prayer warriors and fellow warriors in this cause.
The very fact that he is already involved with another speaking position at another church is the very reason I originally titled this blog "Let's stop Pastor Darrell Gilyard together". I had already seen from past experience with him, how easily he moves from church to church even though he is caught in horrible acts. We need to make sure that we do not fall asleep to the wicked ways of man and stay alert to the things God would call us to do to prevent the plans of the devil to take hold, especially in our churches. When something is going on in our church that is not of God and does not line up with scripture, and we sit back and just allow it to take hold, we are becoming in a sense luke warm and bear some responsibility.
So, this is far from over. We are in the waiting stages before the trial. Not much is happening to speak of, but we need to still pray over the case and over any young women that would come into his path while he is free right now as well.
I do have a new email address as well if any of you feel the need to contact me for any reason, thefamilycircus8@gmail.com
Thank you prayer warriors and fellow warriors in this cause.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
WE HAVE A BABY GIRL!
We have a beautiful baby girl! She was born Monday and weighed 9 lbs. and 1 oz. She is such a joy! We arrived home on Wednesday. So I have been out of touch all week. I have not checked email or the blog, just caught up on all of your comments.
We have a problem however, our baby girl has jaundice and it is pretty severe, the numbers kept climbing and her body was not taking in nourishment. She was eating almost constantly and basically starving at the same time (as a result of the jaundice). She is on a bilirubin light bed 24 hours a day. We have a home health nurse that comes once a day to check her. Last night her numbers escalated quickly and they were considering hospitalizing her. We prayed over her all night and read scriptures (taped them to the walls around her and prayed them) Glory to God, when the nurse came this am her numbers had dropped some and they are giving her another day at home! Praise the Lord. We are on a very rigourous schedule of feedings and care, so I have been confined to my room with her and that is just where I want to be. :-)
We are praying that her body will be healed and whole very quickly as I only get to hold her for 10 minutes every 2 hours. Mommy is wanting to snuggle her more. My husband and other children do not even get the 10 minutes, so we are all ready for this to pass.
Please pray for our beautiful girl. Her name is Ella Sophia Croft. We are believing that God is working on her right now.
Thank you,
Tiffany
We have a problem however, our baby girl has jaundice and it is pretty severe, the numbers kept climbing and her body was not taking in nourishment. She was eating almost constantly and basically starving at the same time (as a result of the jaundice). She is on a bilirubin light bed 24 hours a day. We have a home health nurse that comes once a day to check her. Last night her numbers escalated quickly and they were considering hospitalizing her. We prayed over her all night and read scriptures (taped them to the walls around her and prayed them) Glory to God, when the nurse came this am her numbers had dropped some and they are giving her another day at home! Praise the Lord. We are on a very rigourous schedule of feedings and care, so I have been confined to my room with her and that is just where I want to be. :-)
We are praying that her body will be healed and whole very quickly as I only get to hold her for 10 minutes every 2 hours. Mommy is wanting to snuggle her more. My husband and other children do not even get the 10 minutes, so we are all ready for this to pass.
Please pray for our beautiful girl. Her name is Ella Sophia Croft. We are believing that God is working on her right now.
Thank you,
Tiffany
Thursday, March 27, 2008
More Charges
Darrell Gilyard was arrested last week on two more charges. He turned himself in again and posted his bond.
The arraignment hearing was yesterday March 27th at 9 a.m.
The two new charges are 1. lewd and lascivious with a minor 2.Lewd and lascivious molestation of a minor. If convicted on these charges he can recieve a sentence of 15 to 30 years.
He was verbally warned by the Judge to have no contact with any of the victims. Judge Weatherby actually told him he would be a fool to try.
The next scheduled court date was set for April 30th. - Pre trial Hearing.
CBS 47 video coverage
Fox 30 video coverage
Channel 4 News video coverage
The arraignment hearing was yesterday March 27th at 9 a.m.
The two new charges are 1. lewd and lascivious with a minor 2.Lewd and lascivious molestation of a minor. If convicted on these charges he can recieve a sentence of 15 to 30 years.
He was verbally warned by the Judge to have no contact with any of the victims. Judge Weatherby actually told him he would be a fool to try.
The next scheduled court date was set for April 30th. - Pre trial Hearing.
CBS 47 video coverage
Fox 30 video coverage
Channel 4 News video coverage
Friday, March 21, 2008
Something to Pray For
Please pray that the stall tactics by Hank Coxe will not prevail and will not be left unchecked. Many times attorneys stall a case hoping it will die down. Also in hopes that victims will lose faith and the courage to speak. They will do anything necessary to give themselves the upper hand in the case - especially when they know there is enough to be worried about, that there is a strong case against him.
We can pray against this as we know that our God is more than able to superceed all of those games.
We can pray against this as we know that our God is more than able to superceed all of those games.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Update
Just to remind and update everyone. Tomorrow is the date for the Pre-Trial conference. It is set for 9 a.m. in Court room #5. I will update the sight tomorrow with the details as to what took place. More to come.
We are all patiently waiting. It is a long, slow process.
We are all patiently waiting. It is a long, slow process.
Monday, March 10, 2008
A Pledge to Help
We have another Godly man willing to take a stand. I appreciate his leadership and help. We need more leaders like you Mr. Burleson. Read the post here: http://kerussocharis.blogspot.com/
Monday, March 3, 2008
Fire, Trials and Circumstance
A sermon that I heard over the week end seems appropriate to this situation.
The story of Shadrach, Meshack and Abednego- in short, they faced a King who did not allow them to worship the one true God. They decided to follow and worship God anyway and face whatever consequences may come. Eventually they were thrown into the fire, to be burned alive. They did not pray for God to keep this from happening, or even to deliver them from it, they praised God and accepted their circumstance.Through their faith and obviously God totally protecting them in the fire, the King acknowledged that their God must be the one true God and allowed them and all in the city to worship Him.
Many times, we may wonder why God allows the fire, or trial or circumstance. Why does He not just put an end to it with His power? Such as in this case with Gilyard, why has he been allowed to continue to hurt. We may not know what God is doing or what the outcome may be. But we are called to worship and praise Him even in the midst of the fire. Through this worship, He is allowed to really work and inhabit the praise of His people.
Just a reminder to all of us not to forget who is truly in charge and whose name will be glorified even in the midst of this trial. No matter how long it may take.
Isaiah 58:6 "...to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke."
The story of Shadrach, Meshack and Abednego- in short, they faced a King who did not allow them to worship the one true God. They decided to follow and worship God anyway and face whatever consequences may come. Eventually they were thrown into the fire, to be burned alive. They did not pray for God to keep this from happening, or even to deliver them from it, they praised God and accepted their circumstance.Through their faith and obviously God totally protecting them in the fire, the King acknowledged that their God must be the one true God and allowed them and all in the city to worship Him.
Many times, we may wonder why God allows the fire, or trial or circumstance. Why does He not just put an end to it with His power? Such as in this case with Gilyard, why has he been allowed to continue to hurt. We may not know what God is doing or what the outcome may be. But we are called to worship and praise Him even in the midst of the fire. Through this worship, He is allowed to really work and inhabit the praise of His people.
Just a reminder to all of us not to forget who is truly in charge and whose name will be glorified even in the midst of this trial. No matter how long it may take.
Isaiah 58:6 "...to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke."
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Watch This Video
This is the video from CBS47 News of Don Simpkins from Texas. People are beginning to talk. People from his past are stepping up to the plate to help us and I am so thankful for their bravery. Mr. Simpkins paid a high price for alerting people back in the 90's, and he is more than willing to do it again for the purpose of protecting women and girls in Gilyards future. He knows the depths of this man's corruption, he heard every nasty detail. He knows he is not going to stop. He knows this is what God would have him do and God will protect him!!
Thank you Mr. Simpkins and all of those standing behind you! Thank you for all of your help!
Click on the link below, the video will self load.
Gilyard's former Counselor Don Simkins of Texas breaks the silence
Thank you Mr. Simpkins and all of those standing behind you! Thank you for all of your help!
Click on the link below, the video will self load.
Gilyard's former Counselor Don Simkins of Texas breaks the silence
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Today's Court Update
Today in court, they requested a pre-trial conference for March 19th.
There were a couple of brave people there today that spoke with the news media. In their own words, they were shocked, sick and-dis heartened to hear the allegations against their Pastor. They came to seek out the truth for themselves.
It takes bravery to search for truth when it would be easier to step back and not face it. It took courage to share their opinions with the media as well.
This is what I wish for all people of Shiloh and any other church, search for the truth. You do need to know who your leadership is and ask the Holy Spirit for discernment in who you receive counsel from.
All churches need true men of charachter and Godliness. Sadly, we do need to know about their previous history and not just blindly follow. If many of you had known of Darrell's past problems, would you have chosen him as the leadership of your church? I know many of you would not have allowed your daugthters and wives to counsel alone with him had you been warned, some of you have told me this. I would have never been in the position I was in with him as a young person had I known of his previous issues. I blindly looked up to him and assumed he was the man of God I thought him to be. I was gravely let down.
That is why we are so shocked when we hear of these things, we have looked to this man for spiritual food and guidance, we trusted him, we prayed for him, we stood with him. Man can deceive, man can fall, but the Word of God still stands true. The Holy Spirit can guide us in discernment and also can give us uneasy feelings or warning signs, it is up to us to obey. I had warning signs and the Holy Spirit did stir some things, I pushed them aside and believed it was impossible for this leader to have less than Godly intentions towards me. That is why the scriptures teach us to keep our eyes on the Lord, not on man. He gives us guidelines for Godliness and charachter of our leaders, if they fall short of these things, we need to pray for them and we also need to take a step back and really pay attention.
I am not asking for you to believe me or any hear say, but please do open your minds and hearts to the Holy Spirit asking Him to lead you to truth.
There were a couple of brave people there today that spoke with the news media. In their own words, they were shocked, sick and-dis heartened to hear the allegations against their Pastor. They came to seek out the truth for themselves.
It takes bravery to search for truth when it would be easier to step back and not face it. It took courage to share their opinions with the media as well.
This is what I wish for all people of Shiloh and any other church, search for the truth. You do need to know who your leadership is and ask the Holy Spirit for discernment in who you receive counsel from.
All churches need true men of charachter and Godliness. Sadly, we do need to know about their previous history and not just blindly follow. If many of you had known of Darrell's past problems, would you have chosen him as the leadership of your church? I know many of you would not have allowed your daugthters and wives to counsel alone with him had you been warned, some of you have told me this. I would have never been in the position I was in with him as a young person had I known of his previous issues. I blindly looked up to him and assumed he was the man of God I thought him to be. I was gravely let down.
That is why we are so shocked when we hear of these things, we have looked to this man for spiritual food and guidance, we trusted him, we prayed for him, we stood with him. Man can deceive, man can fall, but the Word of God still stands true. The Holy Spirit can guide us in discernment and also can give us uneasy feelings or warning signs, it is up to us to obey. I had warning signs and the Holy Spirit did stir some things, I pushed them aside and believed it was impossible for this leader to have less than Godly intentions towards me. That is why the scriptures teach us to keep our eyes on the Lord, not on man. He gives us guidelines for Godliness and charachter of our leaders, if they fall short of these things, we need to pray for them and we also need to take a step back and really pay attention.
I am not asking for you to believe me or any hear say, but please do open your minds and hearts to the Holy Spirit asking Him to lead you to truth.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
General Comments
Upon reader requests, I am creating this spot for general comments and questions. A place that will remain at the top for those of you wishing to leave comments in a fresh place sure to be viewed.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
A Meeting For the Victims/Survivors
I would like to extend an invitation to any of you (the victims) to come together and meet each other. There will be total privacy, total safety, and only victims will be present. We will keep the time, date and location private. I will explain more to you directly when you contact me via email.
The purpose will obviously be to have an outlet, a safe one, among people who have walked in your shoes. Only victims of this can truly understand the feelings you have, can relate to you, can cry with you, can encourage you, and finally can strengthen you. We can minister to each other and pray together and for divine restoration. The Lord surely wants us all to heal, and help each other constructively. He has great things for each of us.
All ages of girls or women affected by this man are welcome. Even if you are an adult woman who found yourself in a relationship with him and feel great shame, that was his plan. He hoped you would remain ashamed. Don’t let that keep you away. For those of you who are minors, your parents are welcome to be there with you. Obviously the parents of minors are victims as well as they place their innocent children in the hands of a trusted leader. However, I would like this to remain for victims only (for privacy reasons and to allow openness). Any concerns or questions you may have I will be glad to answer. Any suggestions as well.
My goal with this blog and with speaking out has always been two sided: One side is to put an end to this man’s abuse of women and girls, or atleast his ability to prey within the church from a position of power. Then, secondly to help any of his victims to find healing and put the shame behind them. To create a supportive network of survivors that can help each other heal and find strength to move beyond this.
Mainly, I would like to know how many of you are interested. Please send me an email and we will see where we go from there. Again, your information will be completely confidential. I will not use your name or email in any way even between other victims.
Can we make this happen?? Do you think it is something you would like to do??
The purpose will obviously be to have an outlet, a safe one, among people who have walked in your shoes. Only victims of this can truly understand the feelings you have, can relate to you, can cry with you, can encourage you, and finally can strengthen you. We can minister to each other and pray together and for divine restoration. The Lord surely wants us all to heal, and help each other constructively. He has great things for each of us.
All ages of girls or women affected by this man are welcome. Even if you are an adult woman who found yourself in a relationship with him and feel great shame, that was his plan. He hoped you would remain ashamed. Don’t let that keep you away. For those of you who are minors, your parents are welcome to be there with you. Obviously the parents of minors are victims as well as they place their innocent children in the hands of a trusted leader. However, I would like this to remain for victims only (for privacy reasons and to allow openness). Any concerns or questions you may have I will be glad to answer. Any suggestions as well.
My goal with this blog and with speaking out has always been two sided: One side is to put an end to this man’s abuse of women and girls, or atleast his ability to prey within the church from a position of power. Then, secondly to help any of his victims to find healing and put the shame behind them. To create a supportive network of survivors that can help each other heal and find strength to move beyond this.
Mainly, I would like to know how many of you are interested. Please send me an email and we will see where we go from there. Again, your information will be completely confidential. I will not use your name or email in any way even between other victims.
Can we make this happen?? Do you think it is something you would like to do??
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
How does CSA happen?
This has been written by a very courageous woman who is an abuse survivor. She and her husband are working to not only inform people of this vast problem but also give a ray of hope to those attempting to heal from an abuse situation by a trusted Pastor. As a victim, you are sure to see yourself mirrored in the words below, I hope it helps to break the chains of shame and fear surrounding you. For those of you who may be family members of an abused person, or just someone interested in all of this, I hope that you find understanding and gain more compassion for those who suffer at the hands of a trusted spiritual leader.
You can write to the author and also read more at the blog link below:
http://www.sharonsrose.org/
How does CSA happen?
Clergy Sexual Abuse (CSA) happens when a member of the clergy abuses his power and authority to prey upon a congregant to harm the congregant for self-gratification. In most cases, the victim is a child or an adult woman. There is usually more than one victim. Sex is used as a weapon in this act of violence. Regardless of the degree of physical violence, CSA is always a violent act.
CSA can involve a sudden sexual assault on an unsuspecting victim, but in most cases, CSA doesn’t happen “over night.” Usually, CSA happens over a long period of time “under the noses” of most or all in the congregation.
What does CSA look like?
Every case of CSA is different. However, there are similarities to many cases.
Child CSA: The perpetrator falls into one of several psych categories: (1) Underlying severe psychiatric disorder; (2) Sociopathic/severe narcissistic per-sonality disorders; (3) Sexual impulse disorders; (4) Chronic neurotic and Isolated; (5) Situational offenders; and (6) Naive.1 The victim is a child or teenager under the age of 18. The victim is vulnerable simply because he or she is a child.
Adult CSA: The perpetrator falls into one of several categories as stated above. The victim is an adult (usually a woman), age 18 or older. The victim is not responsible for the sexual acts with the per-petrator. The victim is not an adulteress. It is not an affair. The victim is vulnerable for many reasons, including just being present in the congregation.
Most CSA cases go through phases. Each phase can last days, weeks, months, or even years.
_________
1Gary Richard Schoener. “Not As a Stranger: Evaluating Offenders.” Safe Church Advanced Training for Episcopalians: Lake Morey Resort, VT. Feb. 11, 2003. pp. 9,10.
What are the Phases of CSA?
While the particulars are different in each case, perpetrators usually go through two main phases in committing the act of clergy sexual abuse. After the act is committed, there are yet three more phases in store for the victim.
1. GROOMING PHASE 2. PHYSICAL PHASE
3. DISCOVERY PHASE 4. TELLING PHASE
5. RECOVERY PHASE
Phase 1: THE GROOMING PHASE
Part One, Grooming Phase:
The Perpetrator establishes and develops a relationship with the Victim.
Part Two, Grooming Phase:
The Perpetrator establishes and develops nonphysical Trust, Intimacy, and
Secrecy with the Victim.
Phase 2: THE PHYSICAL PHASE
Part One, Physical Phase:
The Perpetrator “innocently” touches the Victim in ways that seem appropriate (i.e., hugs, pats on shoulder, etc.). Trust, Intimacy and Secrecy are intensified. The Perpetrator is waiting for the right moment to attack.
The Victim has no idea the relationship
will become sexual.
Part Two, Physical Phase:
The Perpetrator sexually touches the Victim in ways that are NOT appropriate. The Victim is brainwashed to believe it is “okay.” The Victim experiences shock and trauma. Secrecy is maintained. This is the part of CSA that is
criminal sexual assault.
Phase 3: THE DISCOVERY PHASE
The Victim realizes the relationship with the Perpetrator is really sexual abuse, and may or may not find the courage to tell someone. The Victim may or may not seek counseling in this phase. The Victim may feel relief or other emotions as he/she finally understands.
Phase 4: THE TELLING PHASE
The Authorities (usually church leaders, e.g., elders, bishops) are informed of the abuse. The Authorities should seek to address the issue, and hold the Perpetrator accountable for his actions. Many churches/denominations have a procedure for handling CSA cases. If handled properly, there will be a stronger outcome for a more rapid recovery of the Victim, as well as the church community. If Authorities collude, healing for the church is obstructed. If the Victim is not believed, blamed, or no longer welcomed, the Victim will experience further shock and trauma.
Phase 5: THE RECOVERY PHASE
Part One, Recovery Phase:
The Victim will experience depression and will need professional help for what happened. As the Victim begins the process of healing, the Victim will need support from family, the church and the community.
The Victim is a “Survivor.”
Part Two, Recovery Phase:
The Survivor gets healing for the wounds, regains wholeness, and is able to “move on” after CSA. The Survivor becomes a “Thriver.”
Copyright © 2007 sharonsrose.org
You can write to the author and also read more at the blog link below:
http://www.sharonsrose.org/
How does CSA happen?
Clergy Sexual Abuse (CSA) happens when a member of the clergy abuses his power and authority to prey upon a congregant to harm the congregant for self-gratification. In most cases, the victim is a child or an adult woman. There is usually more than one victim. Sex is used as a weapon in this act of violence. Regardless of the degree of physical violence, CSA is always a violent act.
CSA can involve a sudden sexual assault on an unsuspecting victim, but in most cases, CSA doesn’t happen “over night.” Usually, CSA happens over a long period of time “under the noses” of most or all in the congregation.
What does CSA look like?
Every case of CSA is different. However, there are similarities to many cases.
Child CSA: The perpetrator falls into one of several psych categories: (1) Underlying severe psychiatric disorder; (2) Sociopathic/severe narcissistic per-sonality disorders; (3) Sexual impulse disorders; (4) Chronic neurotic and Isolated; (5) Situational offenders; and (6) Naive.1 The victim is a child or teenager under the age of 18. The victim is vulnerable simply because he or she is a child.
Adult CSA: The perpetrator falls into one of several categories as stated above. The victim is an adult (usually a woman), age 18 or older. The victim is not responsible for the sexual acts with the per-petrator. The victim is not an adulteress. It is not an affair. The victim is vulnerable for many reasons, including just being present in the congregation.
Most CSA cases go through phases. Each phase can last days, weeks, months, or even years.
_________
1Gary Richard Schoener. “Not As a Stranger: Evaluating Offenders.” Safe Church Advanced Training for Episcopalians: Lake Morey Resort, VT. Feb. 11, 2003. pp. 9,10.
What are the Phases of CSA?
While the particulars are different in each case, perpetrators usually go through two main phases in committing the act of clergy sexual abuse. After the act is committed, there are yet three more phases in store for the victim.
1. GROOMING PHASE 2. PHYSICAL PHASE
3. DISCOVERY PHASE 4. TELLING PHASE
5. RECOVERY PHASE
Phase 1: THE GROOMING PHASE
Part One, Grooming Phase:
The Perpetrator establishes and develops a relationship with the Victim.
Part Two, Grooming Phase:
The Perpetrator establishes and develops nonphysical Trust, Intimacy, and
Secrecy with the Victim.
Phase 2: THE PHYSICAL PHASE
Part One, Physical Phase:
The Perpetrator “innocently” touches the Victim in ways that seem appropriate (i.e., hugs, pats on shoulder, etc.). Trust, Intimacy and Secrecy are intensified. The Perpetrator is waiting for the right moment to attack.
The Victim has no idea the relationship
will become sexual.
Part Two, Physical Phase:
The Perpetrator sexually touches the Victim in ways that are NOT appropriate. The Victim is brainwashed to believe it is “okay.” The Victim experiences shock and trauma. Secrecy is maintained. This is the part of CSA that is
criminal sexual assault.
Phase 3: THE DISCOVERY PHASE
The Victim realizes the relationship with the Perpetrator is really sexual abuse, and may or may not find the courage to tell someone. The Victim may or may not seek counseling in this phase. The Victim may feel relief or other emotions as he/she finally understands.
Phase 4: THE TELLING PHASE
The Authorities (usually church leaders, e.g., elders, bishops) are informed of the abuse. The Authorities should seek to address the issue, and hold the Perpetrator accountable for his actions. Many churches/denominations have a procedure for handling CSA cases. If handled properly, there will be a stronger outcome for a more rapid recovery of the Victim, as well as the church community. If Authorities collude, healing for the church is obstructed. If the Victim is not believed, blamed, or no longer welcomed, the Victim will experience further shock and trauma.
Phase 5: THE RECOVERY PHASE
Part One, Recovery Phase:
The Victim will experience depression and will need professional help for what happened. As the Victim begins the process of healing, the Victim will need support from family, the church and the community.
The Victim is a “Survivor.”
Part Two, Recovery Phase:
The Survivor gets healing for the wounds, regains wholeness, and is able to “move on” after CSA. The Survivor becomes a “Thriver.”
Copyright © 2007 sharonsrose.org
Thursday, February 14, 2008
An exerpt from an article posted in the Nashville Scene today
Consider the rise and fall of one the denomination’s most promising stars.
“Paul had warned those Ephesian elders about an invasion of false teachers. He said, ‘Watch out now, because fierce wolves shall come, not sparing the flock.’ Well, those wolves had come. And deceptive teachers had slithered into the sheepfold.” These were the words of Darrell Gilyard, a young, handsome black pastor, as he stood before the Thomas Road Baptist Church—a mega-church founded by televangelist Jerry Falwell.
In 1989, the vision of this pastor with creamy cocoa skin, decked out in an immaculate steel-gray suit, streamed through the airways on the nationally syndicated broadcast of Falwell’s Old-Time Gospel Hour. As the cameraman cuts to the audience, grown men blink furiously as Gilyard’s voice rises and falls into a soft, gravely tone and moves them to tears.
The man had an undeniable star quality. Gilyard’s mentor, former SBC president Paige Patterson, dubbed him one of the “most brilliant men in the pulpit.” It was that natural charisma and talent that led SBC leaders like Patterson and Jerry Vines, another SBC president, to promote Gilyard.
But when Gilyard stood at the pulpit at Falwell’s church that day in 1989, he already had a dark history with parishioners. A 1991 Dallas Morning News story exposed many of the alleged indiscretions that marked Gilyard’s early career. According to the article, Gilyard had been forced out of a Dallas Baptist church in 1987 amid accusations of sexual impropriety. Yet Gilyard would still have a four-year run as pastor of Victory Baptist Church, another Dallas church.
The same news article included the accounts of several women who said Gilyard sexually abused them—in their homes, the church, even at the base of the pulpit—and they came to Patterson with the allegations. But they say Patterson refused to help them, at times refusing their phone calls or telling them that unless they had proof, he would not see them. Some women said he asked them to refrain from talking about the abuse. In press accounts at the time, Patterson said he was “dealing with a man of special gifts and talents” and that he was “unwilling to call anyone guilty until I had demonstrable evidence that these allegations were true.”
That “demonstrable evidence” wouldn’t come until 1991, when, as the Dallas news account detailed, Gilyard admitted to Patterson that he had committed adultery—even though many of the women’s allegations seemed much more akin to rape than consensual sex. It was then that Patterson finally cut ties with his protégé—but not before he personally prepared the goodbye speech for Gilyard to deliver to Victory Baptist.
Still, there were other congregations waiting for Gilyard.
Shiloh Metropolitan Baptist Church in Florida was once a flock without a shepherd—at least, that’s how they describe themselves. But that changed. “God sent a young man to preach for us...a young man from Dallas, Texas, of national prominence,” the church history reads as it describes Gilyard.
Little did they know that the man who would become their pastor in April 1993, a man who the congregation dubbed their “Moses,” had a trail of victims that snaked westward all the way back to Texas. The people packing the pews at Shiloh—a congregation that impressively grew to more than 7,000 members under 14 years of Gilyard’s leadership—must have fallen hard for him.
His tale of trial and tribulation, a touching story of redemption, was always a crowd pleaser: It was the struggle of a black orphan who grew up on the streets and even lived under a Florida bridge during his teen years. The story was so powerful, in fact, that Falwell peddled The Darrell Gilyard Story, a biographical video that chronicled Gilyard’s rise to fame after a hard-knock life, on his television show.
Too bad it was a lie. Gilyard’s tale of woe unraveled when a Florida woman came forward and said that she raised Gilyard from early childhood to adulthood. Despite reports that their pastor had lied about his past, Gilyard’s parishioners remained steadfast in their devotion.
Even after Gilyard was arrested on Jan. 14 after a woman told the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office that Gilyard sent obscene, sexually explicit text messages to her 14-year-old daughter, the Shiloh website still boasted, “God is doing great works through Pastor Gilyard.... So let us rejoice and thank God for sending us a ‘Moses’ to lead us to higher heights!” Gilyard resigned Jan. 4—10 days before his arrest—and pleaded not guilty to lewd and lascivious conduct.
The Patterson-Gilyard connection is hard for SNAP members to stomach. As is Gilyard’s connection with Vines, who mentored Gilyard as a young seminary student. When the two crossed paths again three or four years ago, Gilyard asked Vines for forgiveness for his past troubles. Vines not only forgave Gilyard, but SNAP says he also lent credibility to the man by preaching at Gilyard’s church.
“What’s unbelievable is that [Patterson and Vines] don’t see how morally reprehensible this is,” Brown says. “They’re blind to it—they’re blind to their own complicity in this horror. And to the contrary, I think they honestly believe that they are doing good and doing the right thing, which was probably true of Catholic bishops as well.”
In January, SNAP sent a letter to trustees at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary in Fort Worth, Texas, where Patterson now serves as president, asking them to temporarily remove Patterson from his position to investigate claims that he failed to warn churches that Gilyard was a serial predator. “I think you’ve got to wonder—this happened 17 years ago—why have there not been other Southern Baptist leaders and ministers to call Patterson out for this?” Brown says. “Why does it take a young mother there in Jacksonville, Fla., who finally speaks out about Gilyard [to expose him]? Why were there not other leaders in this huge denomination who called him on the carpet for this?”
Patterson has characterized SNAP’s claim as “misinformed and inaccurate.” He claims that he’s fought to bring more awareness to clergy sex abuse—what he calls one of the greatest tragedies of the modern era. “Throughout my 50 years in the ministry…I have never turned a blind-eye to clergy sex abuse...and in the classroom and in the pulpit I have steadfastly fought and will continue to warn and fight against it,” Patterson said in a press release following SNAP’s call for an investigation.
But it seems that Patterson never extended those “steadfast” warnings against sex abuse to the string of churches where Gilyard took the pulpit. And as much as Patterson had helped Gilyard, he certainly didn’t expend as much energy—if any—dimming Gilyard’s rising star.
In a press statement, Patterson now says he exercises “no control over autonomous churches anywhere” and that he has “no influence [on churches] not affiliated with the Southern Baptist Convention.”
Religious leaders the Scene interviewed say that even if pastors don’t feel they have a professional obligation to warn churches of sex abuse allegations against a new pastor, as men of God and as human beings they have the moral obligation to protect people in the pews.
Burleson says denominational distinctions shouldn’t make any difference when it comes to protecting people from known sexual predators. “If [Gilyard] went to a Christian church, if he went to a Methodist church...we would inform that church regardless of the denomination.”
Burleson describes Gilyard’s decades-long run of abuse as a shameful indictment on the church and says that the ease with which predators are able to bounce from pulpit to pulpit is a big part of why he’s involved in lobbying the SBC for change. But he knows it won’t be easy.
You can read the artice in its entirety here:
http://www.nashvillescene.com/Stories/Cover_Story/2008/02/14/What_Would_Jesus_Say_/
“Paul had warned those Ephesian elders about an invasion of false teachers. He said, ‘Watch out now, because fierce wolves shall come, not sparing the flock.’ Well, those wolves had come. And deceptive teachers had slithered into the sheepfold.” These were the words of Darrell Gilyard, a young, handsome black pastor, as he stood before the Thomas Road Baptist Church—a mega-church founded by televangelist Jerry Falwell.
In 1989, the vision of this pastor with creamy cocoa skin, decked out in an immaculate steel-gray suit, streamed through the airways on the nationally syndicated broadcast of Falwell’s Old-Time Gospel Hour. As the cameraman cuts to the audience, grown men blink furiously as Gilyard’s voice rises and falls into a soft, gravely tone and moves them to tears.
The man had an undeniable star quality. Gilyard’s mentor, former SBC president Paige Patterson, dubbed him one of the “most brilliant men in the pulpit.” It was that natural charisma and talent that led SBC leaders like Patterson and Jerry Vines, another SBC president, to promote Gilyard.
But when Gilyard stood at the pulpit at Falwell’s church that day in 1989, he already had a dark history with parishioners. A 1991 Dallas Morning News story exposed many of the alleged indiscretions that marked Gilyard’s early career. According to the article, Gilyard had been forced out of a Dallas Baptist church in 1987 amid accusations of sexual impropriety. Yet Gilyard would still have a four-year run as pastor of Victory Baptist Church, another Dallas church.
The same news article included the accounts of several women who said Gilyard sexually abused them—in their homes, the church, even at the base of the pulpit—and they came to Patterson with the allegations. But they say Patterson refused to help them, at times refusing their phone calls or telling them that unless they had proof, he would not see them. Some women said he asked them to refrain from talking about the abuse. In press accounts at the time, Patterson said he was “dealing with a man of special gifts and talents” and that he was “unwilling to call anyone guilty until I had demonstrable evidence that these allegations were true.”
That “demonstrable evidence” wouldn’t come until 1991, when, as the Dallas news account detailed, Gilyard admitted to Patterson that he had committed adultery—even though many of the women’s allegations seemed much more akin to rape than consensual sex. It was then that Patterson finally cut ties with his protégé—but not before he personally prepared the goodbye speech for Gilyard to deliver to Victory Baptist.
Still, there were other congregations waiting for Gilyard.
Shiloh Metropolitan Baptist Church in Florida was once a flock without a shepherd—at least, that’s how they describe themselves. But that changed. “God sent a young man to preach for us...a young man from Dallas, Texas, of national prominence,” the church history reads as it describes Gilyard.
Little did they know that the man who would become their pastor in April 1993, a man who the congregation dubbed their “Moses,” had a trail of victims that snaked westward all the way back to Texas. The people packing the pews at Shiloh—a congregation that impressively grew to more than 7,000 members under 14 years of Gilyard’s leadership—must have fallen hard for him.
His tale of trial and tribulation, a touching story of redemption, was always a crowd pleaser: It was the struggle of a black orphan who grew up on the streets and even lived under a Florida bridge during his teen years. The story was so powerful, in fact, that Falwell peddled The Darrell Gilyard Story, a biographical video that chronicled Gilyard’s rise to fame after a hard-knock life, on his television show.
Too bad it was a lie. Gilyard’s tale of woe unraveled when a Florida woman came forward and said that she raised Gilyard from early childhood to adulthood. Despite reports that their pastor had lied about his past, Gilyard’s parishioners remained steadfast in their devotion.
Even after Gilyard was arrested on Jan. 14 after a woman told the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office that Gilyard sent obscene, sexually explicit text messages to her 14-year-old daughter, the Shiloh website still boasted, “God is doing great works through Pastor Gilyard.... So let us rejoice and thank God for sending us a ‘Moses’ to lead us to higher heights!” Gilyard resigned Jan. 4—10 days before his arrest—and pleaded not guilty to lewd and lascivious conduct.
The Patterson-Gilyard connection is hard for SNAP members to stomach. As is Gilyard’s connection with Vines, who mentored Gilyard as a young seminary student. When the two crossed paths again three or four years ago, Gilyard asked Vines for forgiveness for his past troubles. Vines not only forgave Gilyard, but SNAP says he also lent credibility to the man by preaching at Gilyard’s church.
“What’s unbelievable is that [Patterson and Vines] don’t see how morally reprehensible this is,” Brown says. “They’re blind to it—they’re blind to their own complicity in this horror. And to the contrary, I think they honestly believe that they are doing good and doing the right thing, which was probably true of Catholic bishops as well.”
In January, SNAP sent a letter to trustees at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary in Fort Worth, Texas, where Patterson now serves as president, asking them to temporarily remove Patterson from his position to investigate claims that he failed to warn churches that Gilyard was a serial predator. “I think you’ve got to wonder—this happened 17 years ago—why have there not been other Southern Baptist leaders and ministers to call Patterson out for this?” Brown says. “Why does it take a young mother there in Jacksonville, Fla., who finally speaks out about Gilyard [to expose him]? Why were there not other leaders in this huge denomination who called him on the carpet for this?”
Patterson has characterized SNAP’s claim as “misinformed and inaccurate.” He claims that he’s fought to bring more awareness to clergy sex abuse—what he calls one of the greatest tragedies of the modern era. “Throughout my 50 years in the ministry…I have never turned a blind-eye to clergy sex abuse...and in the classroom and in the pulpit I have steadfastly fought and will continue to warn and fight against it,” Patterson said in a press release following SNAP’s call for an investigation.
But it seems that Patterson never extended those “steadfast” warnings against sex abuse to the string of churches where Gilyard took the pulpit. And as much as Patterson had helped Gilyard, he certainly didn’t expend as much energy—if any—dimming Gilyard’s rising star.
In a press statement, Patterson now says he exercises “no control over autonomous churches anywhere” and that he has “no influence [on churches] not affiliated with the Southern Baptist Convention.”
Religious leaders the Scene interviewed say that even if pastors don’t feel they have a professional obligation to warn churches of sex abuse allegations against a new pastor, as men of God and as human beings they have the moral obligation to protect people in the pews.
Burleson says denominational distinctions shouldn’t make any difference when it comes to protecting people from known sexual predators. “If [Gilyard] went to a Christian church, if he went to a Methodist church...we would inform that church regardless of the denomination.”
Burleson describes Gilyard’s decades-long run of abuse as a shameful indictment on the church and says that the ease with which predators are able to bounce from pulpit to pulpit is a big part of why he’s involved in lobbying the SBC for change. But he knows it won’t be easy.
You can read the artice in its entirety here:
http://www.nashvillescene.com/Stories/Cover_Story/2008/02/14/What_Would_Jesus_Say_/
Monday, February 11, 2008
God is Always At Work. Even When We Cannot See His Hand!
A Beautiful story that helps us understand that things do happen for a reason. Please read the entire story, you will be amazed at the ending. God's hand is in everything, even when it takes years to see the results and even when the circumstances and waiting do not make sense.
The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned to their first ministry, to reopen a church in suburban Brooklyn , arrived in early October excited about their opportunities. When they saw their church, it was very run down and needed much work. They set a goal to have everything done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve. They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc, and on December 18 were ahead of schedule and just about finished. On December 19 a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two days. On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church. His heart sank when he saw that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 20 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high. The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to do but postpone the Christmas Eve service, he headed home.
On the way he noticed that a local business was having a flea market type sale for charity so he stopped in. One of the items was a beautiful, handmade, ivory colored, crocheted tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross embroidered right in the center. It was just the right size to cover up the hole in the front wall. He bought it and headed back to the church. By this time it had started to snow. An older woman running from the opposite direction was trying to catch the bus.. She missed it. The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later. She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc., to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry.
The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and that it covered up the entire problem area. Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like a sheet.. "Pastor," she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?" The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into it there. They were. These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria. The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just gotten the Tablecloth. The woman explained that before the war she and her husband were well-to-do people in Austria . When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave. Her husband was going to follow her the next week. He was captured, sent to prison and she never saw her husband or her home again. The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep it for the church. The pastor insisted on driving her home, that was the least he could do. She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a housecleaning job.
What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve. The church was almost full. The music and the spirit were great. At the end of the service, the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return. One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn't leaving. The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in Austria before the war and how could there be two tablecloths so much alike. He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for her safety and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a prison.. He never saw his wife or his home again all the 35 years in between. The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride.
They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier. He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on the door and he saw the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine.
True Story - submitted by Pastor Rob Reid and passed along to me by friends.
Who says God does not work in mysterious ways. His love is always with us, His promises are true, and when we give Him all our cares, He will see us through. So when the road you're traveling on seems difficult at best. Just remember God has a plan, even when we can't see His hand at work. When there is nothing left but God, that is when you find out that God is all you need.
The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned to their first ministry, to reopen a church in suburban Brooklyn , arrived in early October excited about their opportunities. When they saw their church, it was very run down and needed much work. They set a goal to have everything done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve. They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc, and on December 18 were ahead of schedule and just about finished. On December 19 a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two days. On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church. His heart sank when he saw that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 20 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high. The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to do but postpone the Christmas Eve service, he headed home.
On the way he noticed that a local business was having a flea market type sale for charity so he stopped in. One of the items was a beautiful, handmade, ivory colored, crocheted tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross embroidered right in the center. It was just the right size to cover up the hole in the front wall. He bought it and headed back to the church. By this time it had started to snow. An older woman running from the opposite direction was trying to catch the bus.. She missed it. The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later. She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc., to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry.
The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and that it covered up the entire problem area. Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like a sheet.. "Pastor," she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?" The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into it there. They were. These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria. The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just gotten the Tablecloth. The woman explained that before the war she and her husband were well-to-do people in Austria . When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave. Her husband was going to follow her the next week. He was captured, sent to prison and she never saw her husband or her home again. The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep it for the church. The pastor insisted on driving her home, that was the least he could do. She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a housecleaning job.
What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve. The church was almost full. The music and the spirit were great. At the end of the service, the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return. One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn't leaving. The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in Austria before the war and how could there be two tablecloths so much alike. He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for her safety and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a prison.. He never saw his wife or his home again all the 35 years in between. The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride.
They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier. He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on the door and he saw the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine.
True Story - submitted by Pastor Rob Reid and passed along to me by friends.
Who says God does not work in mysterious ways. His love is always with us, His promises are true, and when we give Him all our cares, He will see us through. So when the road you're traveling on seems difficult at best. Just remember God has a plan, even when we can't see His hand at work. When there is nothing left but God, that is when you find out that God is all you need.
Friday, February 8, 2008
A Plea From A Victims Mother
Stunned Mom said...
Calling on all victims past and present of Darrell Gilyard. Please share your experiences with the States Attorney’s office. Your name will not be broadcasted, but they need your stories. Please think of future women and young teens and not just about yourself. I don’t want what happened with my daughter to happen to another female. Many people keep saying the adults knew and I agree they have some accountability, but if you’ve never been caught up in Darrell’s web, you don’t know how controlling he is. God help him please.
Darrell we forgive you as you have asked of us and required by God to do so, however we are praying that the Holy Spirit convicts you to repent and tell the truth to your lawyer and the authorities. Why waste all that money for someone to try to bury your wrong-doings?
February 8, 2008 6:27 AM
Calling on all victims past and present of Darrell Gilyard. Please share your experiences with the States Attorney’s office. Your name will not be broadcasted, but they need your stories. Please think of future women and young teens and not just about yourself. I don’t want what happened with my daughter to happen to another female. Many people keep saying the adults knew and I agree they have some accountability, but if you’ve never been caught up in Darrell’s web, you don’t know how controlling he is. God help him please.
Darrell we forgive you as you have asked of us and required by God to do so, however we are praying that the Holy Spirit convicts you to repent and tell the truth to your lawyer and the authorities. Why waste all that money for someone to try to bury your wrong-doings?
February 8, 2008 6:27 AM
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
My Husband Shares His Heart
I’ve poured out my heart over some of the things that have been said here against Tiffany, now I feel that it is time to speak out. I hope that she will see a way to add this as a “post” as opposed to a “comment”.
What I can say about her is:
She is incredible!
She is strong!
She is the one making a sacrifice to speak out!
She is the one reaching out to help others and encourage exposure!
She is one of the most truthful and respected women that I know personally!
She will confront the issue and not back down!
She has endured a lot in her walk through life and these experiences have molded her along with providing her with the strength to answer the calling that God has placed upon her. I’m not asking anyone to “trust” what I’m saying here but if you will be patient you will see things unfold in a way that I cannot fully explain here.
I will reiterate that this is an on going investigation including minors, thus meaning that there are aspects of the case that cannot be released for fear of causing damage. So stop making accusations, threats and asking for proof, you won’t receive that information here.
I don’t profess to be God, act as nor wish to be God.
I do believe in ONE chance not many chances! There have been too many.
Therefore, thus said several persons have felt the need to threaten her. Stop! Several persons have also attempted to push her into responses regarding her involvement with DG. She doesn’t need to prove anything to anyone here or any other place for that matter. So the comments that accuse her of being “involved” with DG are baseless and immature along with the innuendos that accompany the previous statement. This also goes for the comments directed at others that have posted here. They deserve better from those of you that post and comment on this blog.
Some have also stated time after time that God isn’t covering this or God isn’t proud of this or God isn’t blessing this or even that God wouldn’t be happy with Tiffany. I beg to Differ, do you actually believe that he is happy with DG? Is he happy with the “churches” of today? Is he happy with your thoughts and judgment of Tiffany? Be real with yourselves.
The part that bothers me is the lack of respect and consideration for others including bloggers, family members, survivors and victims. Thus meaning that this is a place for these people to come and heal, recover and share of the terrible incidences that they were involved. They deserve the opportunity to do this in a safe environment free of fear and intimidation from other bloggers. Wouldn’t you concede that they have ALL endured enough?
P.S.
DG hired “Hank” Coxe a well connected and respected Criminal Defense Attorney, for ONE reason and that reason is Freedom. He has done so in light of the overwhelming evidence against him. Even if DG has the opportunity to walk away I’m confident that his walk will be a short one.
Blessings to you all,
The Husband, Mr. Croft
PSS.
Tiff,
don't look back,
you've stepped over the line. (and they don't like it)
don't let up, back up, give up, or shut up.
I know your focus is clear,
your path straight,
your God is reliable.
You are a Disciple of Christ.
I have your back, you have my support.
What I can say about her is:
She is incredible!
She is strong!
She is the one making a sacrifice to speak out!
She is the one reaching out to help others and encourage exposure!
She is one of the most truthful and respected women that I know personally!
She will confront the issue and not back down!
She has endured a lot in her walk through life and these experiences have molded her along with providing her with the strength to answer the calling that God has placed upon her. I’m not asking anyone to “trust” what I’m saying here but if you will be patient you will see things unfold in a way that I cannot fully explain here.
I will reiterate that this is an on going investigation including minors, thus meaning that there are aspects of the case that cannot be released for fear of causing damage. So stop making accusations, threats and asking for proof, you won’t receive that information here.
I don’t profess to be God, act as nor wish to be God.
I do believe in ONE chance not many chances! There have been too many.
Therefore, thus said several persons have felt the need to threaten her. Stop! Several persons have also attempted to push her into responses regarding her involvement with DG. She doesn’t need to prove anything to anyone here or any other place for that matter. So the comments that accuse her of being “involved” with DG are baseless and immature along with the innuendos that accompany the previous statement. This also goes for the comments directed at others that have posted here. They deserve better from those of you that post and comment on this blog.
Some have also stated time after time that God isn’t covering this or God isn’t proud of this or God isn’t blessing this or even that God wouldn’t be happy with Tiffany. I beg to Differ, do you actually believe that he is happy with DG? Is he happy with the “churches” of today? Is he happy with your thoughts and judgment of Tiffany? Be real with yourselves.
The part that bothers me is the lack of respect and consideration for others including bloggers, family members, survivors and victims. Thus meaning that this is a place for these people to come and heal, recover and share of the terrible incidences that they were involved. They deserve the opportunity to do this in a safe environment free of fear and intimidation from other bloggers. Wouldn’t you concede that they have ALL endured enough?
P.S.
DG hired “Hank” Coxe a well connected and respected Criminal Defense Attorney, for ONE reason and that reason is Freedom. He has done so in light of the overwhelming evidence against him. Even if DG has the opportunity to walk away I’m confident that his walk will be a short one.
Blessings to you all,
The Husband, Mr. Croft
PSS.
Tiff,
don't look back,
you've stepped over the line. (and they don't like it)
don't let up, back up, give up, or shut up.
I know your focus is clear,
your path straight,
your God is reliable.
You are a Disciple of Christ.
I have your back, you have my support.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Court News
The outcome of today is that he and his attorney made a Not Guilty plea. He was not present in court, they entered the plea in the Judges chambers privately. The next court date is set for February 26th.
Monday, February 4, 2008
No Matter What the Outcome of Court...
The arraignment is set for tomorrow at 9 a.m. I will be there along with others and will update the site as soon as I can. Hopefully he will be held accountable this time and will not be able to continue to damage peoples lives.
I truly do pray that he will get help and that he will someday repent of his sins. I do not believe that he could possibly be saved, so I also pray that he will make that decision. If not, he has truly wasted away his life and will have eternal consequences. Please understand, I am not judging him and I truly do not wish to see him (or anyone) spend an eternity seperated from God. Many of you believe he must be saved simply because he was a Pastor. The Bible is clear in Matthew 7:21 "Not everyone who says to me, Lord, Lord, will enter the kingdom of Heaven..." vs 22 "Many will say to me 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?" vs 23 "Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me you evildoers." Before this, in vs. 15, He says "Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly, they are ferocious wolves..."
I truly believe that this describes this man who has been preaching God's word all of these years, falsely telling us that He was in love with our Savior and covered under His blood. Unfortunately, he was also a wolf preying on the Savior's sheep!
We are all sinners saved by grace. We all sin, and are called by the Holy spirit to repentance. Only God and the Holy Spirit within him knows the thoughts of man, "but the man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are not spiritually discerned." In other words, Darrell is not convicted about his actions if He is not under the covering of the blood and under the submission of the Spirit.
Hebrews 4:12 says that the Word of God is living and active, sharper than any two edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight. EVERYTHING is laid bare before the eyes of him who must give account."
vs. 15 says, "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses..." I Corinthians says, that "No temptation has seized you but what is common to man. God will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way of escape." We serve a compassionate God, full of mercy, slow to anger. He provides a way of escape, before the opportunity to sin prevents itself, and then He has open arms for repentance even if we fall. But, he warns us in I Corinthians 15:58 "Stand firm. Let nothing move you." yet the consequence, "The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law." James 2:14 "each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is fullgrown, gives birth to death."
Finally, we know that prayers avail much, James 5:19 says, "Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his ways will save him from death and cover a multitude of sins."
I do not know if it is possible for this man to see the error of his ways, but we would be doing the right thing (along with seeking justice from the earthly laws) to pray for his salvation. "Godly sorrow leads to repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death."
To the victims, may there be closure in some earthly justice. And healing in the knowledge that he will (hopefully) not be able to offend again.
As for tomorrow's court date, no matter what happens:
Hallelujah, All glory to God.
Hallelujah, All honor to God.
No matter what, we will worship the Lord God and to Him only shall we serve!
To the victims, may there be closure in some earthly justice.
I truly do pray that he will get help and that he will someday repent of his sins. I do not believe that he could possibly be saved, so I also pray that he will make that decision. If not, he has truly wasted away his life and will have eternal consequences. Please understand, I am not judging him and I truly do not wish to see him (or anyone) spend an eternity seperated from God. Many of you believe he must be saved simply because he was a Pastor. The Bible is clear in Matthew 7:21 "Not everyone who says to me, Lord, Lord, will enter the kingdom of Heaven..." vs 22 "Many will say to me 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?" vs 23 "Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me you evildoers." Before this, in vs. 15, He says "Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly, they are ferocious wolves..."
I truly believe that this describes this man who has been preaching God's word all of these years, falsely telling us that He was in love with our Savior and covered under His blood. Unfortunately, he was also a wolf preying on the Savior's sheep!
We are all sinners saved by grace. We all sin, and are called by the Holy spirit to repentance. Only God and the Holy Spirit within him knows the thoughts of man, "but the man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are not spiritually discerned." In other words, Darrell is not convicted about his actions if He is not under the covering of the blood and under the submission of the Spirit.
Hebrews 4:12 says that the Word of God is living and active, sharper than any two edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight. EVERYTHING is laid bare before the eyes of him who must give account."
vs. 15 says, "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses..." I Corinthians says, that "No temptation has seized you but what is common to man. God will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way of escape." We serve a compassionate God, full of mercy, slow to anger. He provides a way of escape, before the opportunity to sin prevents itself, and then He has open arms for repentance even if we fall. But, he warns us in I Corinthians 15:58 "Stand firm. Let nothing move you." yet the consequence, "The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law." James 2:14 "each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is fullgrown, gives birth to death."
Finally, we know that prayers avail much, James 5:19 says, "Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his ways will save him from death and cover a multitude of sins."
I do not know if it is possible for this man to see the error of his ways, but we would be doing the right thing (along with seeking justice from the earthly laws) to pray for his salvation. "Godly sorrow leads to repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death."
To the victims, may there be closure in some earthly justice. And healing in the knowledge that he will (hopefully) not be able to offend again.
As for tomorrow's court date, no matter what happens:
Hallelujah, All glory to God.
Hallelujah, All honor to God.
No matter what, we will worship the Lord God and to Him only shall we serve!
To the victims, may there be closure in some earthly justice.
Friday, February 1, 2008
The First Signs of Trouble
This is a letter received from a former Criswell College student who was there with Gilyard at the beginning of his "career".
I have been given permission to share her story, although all personal references to her have been edited. She has been brave and courageous in giving her personal testimony.
She has decided to do this after one of my friends encouraged her to do so. Along with responding to the questions below that were presented to her after her initial statement.
“I was a student at Criswell College with Darrell Gilyard. He was the most dynamic and gifted preacher I'd ever heard. As a student at Criswell, we were afforded sermons from the who's who in SBC churches. Vines was a regular guest. I don't care how many times you'd heard his (Darrell’s) life story of living under a bridge; it always brought you to tears. Darrell was put on a fast track and protected from the consequences of his actions. Therefore, the monster we know today was created. I'm just learning of just how many times he has betrayed God and his church.
The first was while Darrell was an assistant pastor at Concord in South Dallas. He accused the pastor of having affairs and other wrong doings when it was actually him who was the cad. As students, we only knew that Dr Patterson wanted us to know. We all banded around Darrell when Rev. Bailey stood against him. We all assumed and were led to believe by the CC (Criswell College) muckety muck, that the accusations were untrue and that it was just Rev. Bailey's jealousy of Darrell's abilities that had him speaking against Darrell. We had no idea that 25 women were accusing him. We thought it was basically just Rev. Bailey. I remember the problems and the tension between Concord and FBC/CC. (FBC in Texas) They "mended" fences and Rev. Bailey was invited to preach at the semi-weekly chapel. Most students boycotted Rev. Bailey's sermon.
I remember how proud we all were of Darrell's first appearance on Jerry Falwell's TV program. We had watch parties and taped it to be played many times bragging that "I know him!" Falwell put lots of money and time into the production of that first show. Why did people keep protecting him even after his adopted mother called in with the facts after that show aired? This could have saved untold women, and now children, from the abuses they have suffered.
Darrell then pastored a series of churches in Texas and Oklahoma. He didn't stay at any church for long. He and the school administration were able to keep the student body from finding out why. I had no idea that he tried to rape a female student. he tried to rape while in school. I think I have a good idea who it was because she dropped out of site, moved and left no forwarding address. Through all this, Jana stood beside him, supporting him. (Darrell is VERY convincing and most would never believe him capable of the things he's done.)
Then came Victory Baptist Church and his numerous affairs there. Bless Jana's heart. I do not blame her for divorcing Darrell. I was crushed to discover Darrell's true nature. After standing with him when we thought he had been wrongly accused, I felt as betrayed as Jana must have felt.
I do not understand why Page Patterson has protected and shielded Darrell for so many years. My guess is that Paige is living vicariously through Darrell since Dr. Patterson will NEVER be 1/10th the preacher Darrell is. Paige and the administration of FBC and CC created a man who never had to face the consequences of his actions because they protected him and swept his indiscretions under the rug. Within 2 weeks of his resigning in disgrace from Victory, Darrell was back in Florida at the pulpit of yet another unsuspecting congregation.
Thank you for putting the spot light on this issue and doing the work that is necessary to expose the charlatans in our denomination. May our Lord bless you!
Then my friend responded back to her:
Hi, you have a very interesting perspective, thank you for sharing it. Can we have your permission to post your email on one of the blogs for others to read? We would be happy to withhold your name if you like. So please let us know if we can use your letter to post on our blog... (Received permission as long as her name was not there)
A couple of follow up questions:
1. Is Rev Bailey still around? Do you know if he is still pastoring? What is his full name? Do you know how he might be contacted?
His name was E. K. Bailey, but in doing a quick Google search I've discovered that he is deceased. However, his family is still around and you can do a little research and find contact information at http://www.ekbailey.org/Index.cfm?FuseAction=Page&PageID=1000000 His wife and son are very involved in the ministry he started and I'm sure they would be willing to clear EK's name and reputation. DG tried to bring him down after he was found out and accused so I'm sure they will give you some first hand insight into the late 80's.
2. Before DG went to Concorde, were there allegations that you knew of at Criswell College against DG? Were there credible allegations made by women at Criswell against DG? Did PP defend DG against those allegations at the school?
Everything was very hush hush. I didn't know that there were 25 women accusing DG at Concord until I read http://stopbaptistpredators.blogspot.com/2007/12/two-sbc-presidents-knew-lot-but-what.html I'm thinking back and whoever the woman is that he tried to or did rape was effectively kept quiet.
I do remember one dropped out suddenly, moved and I've never heard from her since. She was a gorgeous petite woman who very well would have fought back. I was startled and hurt by her sudden departure. Back then, the student body was only a couple hundred students and we were a very close knit group.
The allegations made by Rev Bailey were chalked up to jealousy over DG's abilities. We were never told the extent of the accusations. We were only told that Darrell had discovered that Bailey was having affairs and the like and that the accusations made by Concord were an effort to ruin a man of God.
We all stood with Darrell against the evil Bailey, or so we were led to believe. PP (Patterson) was a master manipulator. He was full of his own self-importance as was his wife Dorothy. They came across as really insincere. I think wrapped up in their own self-importance would be a really good description. PP wasn't the evangelist and church grower that his father was, nor was he the orator that DG was. He was riding the coattails all the time.
This was also during the time the conservatives were trying to take back over the convention from the liberals. PP was a very absent president and it caused a lot of friction with the board and the faculty. He had the blessing of WA Criswell so he was safe at CC. The school created a new position for him and appointed a new president because the school was suffering from his lack of attention.
(Note: I deleted some info that pertains to her personally but her accounts are from the years 1984- 1988)
PP was somehow able to keep things very quiet. I don't know if any of the faculty from that era would be willing to talk. Maybe some of the ones who have left might be willing to talk.
(I deleted the list of people to try and contact for privacy reasons)
3. Some of the newspaper accounts back then quoted PP as hinting that those opposing DG were racially motivated. Was your recollection back then that PP was leading people at CC to believe that Bailey had other motives in discrediting DG? In what manner did PP lead the students to believe that DG was innocent and that Bailey was out to get him? Did PP ever come out and verbally defend DG?
I wouldn't doubt that PP would have attributed DG's "persecution" to race. PP led us to believe that EK was jealous of DG and that it wasn't so much race as it was just envy of DG's abilities. PP's support of DG was absolute and if anyone spoke against him, there were real consequences. Since EK was black and the majority of Concord was too, the race issue wasn't an issue, as I remember it. It was just that EK was used to being the "go to" black preacher in Dallas and DG was going to usurpt that position. We were told that the accusations were patently false and that DG was completely innocent of anything that EK accused
4. PP has recently defended himself by saying he did try to stop DG by getting him to resign from Victory Baptist after it was found that he had sex with women he was counseling. Is your belief that PP protected Gilyard based on PP's failure to stop DG sooner than this?
I don't know that PP has a conscious. After finding out the extent of DG's sexual misconduct over the last couple of days of research, PP was in the cover-up up to his red hair. DG was the rising star and PP's ticket to the big time. PP was power and fame hungry back in those days. He was making himself a name with Judge Pressler reclaiming the SBC for Christ. DG figured prominently in this, I'm sure. See what good conservative schools can turn out...great preachers like DG. Makes me wonder what other skeletons PP has hidden in his own closet. I've never trusted him because he seemed like such a fake person. This probably colors my perceptions, but then again my impressions may have been spot on.
(Deleted more personal info here but she knew DG personally)
DG was working in better men's wear at Dillard’s at that time (while in school).
I know that we stood up and vehemently defended DG against the big bad EK.
Keep me posted to new developments, please. As one who was personally misled, I feel very betrayed and want to see him punished for his sins and crimes. One warming thought is that child sexual predators are the scum of the earth in prison and they are not treated well at all by the other inmates. Prisoners have standards, too, and harming a child is the worst thing one can do and be locked up! ”
I have been given permission to share her story, although all personal references to her have been edited. She has been brave and courageous in giving her personal testimony.
She has decided to do this after one of my friends encouraged her to do so. Along with responding to the questions below that were presented to her after her initial statement.
“I was a student at Criswell College with Darrell Gilyard. He was the most dynamic and gifted preacher I'd ever heard. As a student at Criswell, we were afforded sermons from the who's who in SBC churches. Vines was a regular guest. I don't care how many times you'd heard his (Darrell’s) life story of living under a bridge; it always brought you to tears. Darrell was put on a fast track and protected from the consequences of his actions. Therefore, the monster we know today was created. I'm just learning of just how many times he has betrayed God and his church.
The first was while Darrell was an assistant pastor at Concord in South Dallas. He accused the pastor of having affairs and other wrong doings when it was actually him who was the cad. As students, we only knew that Dr Patterson wanted us to know. We all banded around Darrell when Rev. Bailey stood against him. We all assumed and were led to believe by the CC (Criswell College) muckety muck, that the accusations were untrue and that it was just Rev. Bailey's jealousy of Darrell's abilities that had him speaking against Darrell. We had no idea that 25 women were accusing him. We thought it was basically just Rev. Bailey. I remember the problems and the tension between Concord and FBC/CC. (FBC in Texas) They "mended" fences and Rev. Bailey was invited to preach at the semi-weekly chapel. Most students boycotted Rev. Bailey's sermon.
I remember how proud we all were of Darrell's first appearance on Jerry Falwell's TV program. We had watch parties and taped it to be played many times bragging that "I know him!" Falwell put lots of money and time into the production of that first show. Why did people keep protecting him even after his adopted mother called in with the facts after that show aired? This could have saved untold women, and now children, from the abuses they have suffered.
Darrell then pastored a series of churches in Texas and Oklahoma. He didn't stay at any church for long. He and the school administration were able to keep the student body from finding out why. I had no idea that he tried to rape a female student. he tried to rape while in school. I think I have a good idea who it was because she dropped out of site, moved and left no forwarding address. Through all this, Jana stood beside him, supporting him. (Darrell is VERY convincing and most would never believe him capable of the things he's done.)
Then came Victory Baptist Church and his numerous affairs there. Bless Jana's heart. I do not blame her for divorcing Darrell. I was crushed to discover Darrell's true nature. After standing with him when we thought he had been wrongly accused, I felt as betrayed as Jana must have felt.
I do not understand why Page Patterson has protected and shielded Darrell for so many years. My guess is that Paige is living vicariously through Darrell since Dr. Patterson will NEVER be 1/10th the preacher Darrell is. Paige and the administration of FBC and CC created a man who never had to face the consequences of his actions because they protected him and swept his indiscretions under the rug. Within 2 weeks of his resigning in disgrace from Victory, Darrell was back in Florida at the pulpit of yet another unsuspecting congregation.
Thank you for putting the spot light on this issue and doing the work that is necessary to expose the charlatans in our denomination. May our Lord bless you!
Then my friend responded back to her:
Hi, you have a very interesting perspective, thank you for sharing it. Can we have your permission to post your email on one of the blogs for others to read? We would be happy to withhold your name if you like. So please let us know if we can use your letter to post on our blog... (Received permission as long as her name was not there)
A couple of follow up questions:
1. Is Rev Bailey still around? Do you know if he is still pastoring? What is his full name? Do you know how he might be contacted?
His name was E. K. Bailey, but in doing a quick Google search I've discovered that he is deceased. However, his family is still around and you can do a little research and find contact information at http://www.ekbailey.org/Index.cfm?FuseAction=Page&PageID=1000000 His wife and son are very involved in the ministry he started and I'm sure they would be willing to clear EK's name and reputation. DG tried to bring him down after he was found out and accused so I'm sure they will give you some first hand insight into the late 80's.
2. Before DG went to Concorde, were there allegations that you knew of at Criswell College against DG? Were there credible allegations made by women at Criswell against DG? Did PP defend DG against those allegations at the school?
Everything was very hush hush. I didn't know that there were 25 women accusing DG at Concord until I read http://stopbaptistpredators.blogspot.com/2007/12/two-sbc-presidents-knew-lot-but-what.html I'm thinking back and whoever the woman is that he tried to or did rape was effectively kept quiet.
I do remember one dropped out suddenly, moved and I've never heard from her since. She was a gorgeous petite woman who very well would have fought back. I was startled and hurt by her sudden departure. Back then, the student body was only a couple hundred students and we were a very close knit group.
The allegations made by Rev Bailey were chalked up to jealousy over DG's abilities. We were never told the extent of the accusations. We were only told that Darrell had discovered that Bailey was having affairs and the like and that the accusations made by Concord were an effort to ruin a man of God.
We all stood with Darrell against the evil Bailey, or so we were led to believe. PP (Patterson) was a master manipulator. He was full of his own self-importance as was his wife Dorothy. They came across as really insincere. I think wrapped up in their own self-importance would be a really good description. PP wasn't the evangelist and church grower that his father was, nor was he the orator that DG was. He was riding the coattails all the time.
This was also during the time the conservatives were trying to take back over the convention from the liberals. PP was a very absent president and it caused a lot of friction with the board and the faculty. He had the blessing of WA Criswell so he was safe at CC. The school created a new position for him and appointed a new president because the school was suffering from his lack of attention.
(Note: I deleted some info that pertains to her personally but her accounts are from the years 1984- 1988)
PP was somehow able to keep things very quiet. I don't know if any of the faculty from that era would be willing to talk. Maybe some of the ones who have left might be willing to talk.
(I deleted the list of people to try and contact for privacy reasons)
3. Some of the newspaper accounts back then quoted PP as hinting that those opposing DG were racially motivated. Was your recollection back then that PP was leading people at CC to believe that Bailey had other motives in discrediting DG? In what manner did PP lead the students to believe that DG was innocent and that Bailey was out to get him? Did PP ever come out and verbally defend DG?
I wouldn't doubt that PP would have attributed DG's "persecution" to race. PP led us to believe that EK was jealous of DG and that it wasn't so much race as it was just envy of DG's abilities. PP's support of DG was absolute and if anyone spoke against him, there were real consequences. Since EK was black and the majority of Concord was too, the race issue wasn't an issue, as I remember it. It was just that EK was used to being the "go to" black preacher in Dallas and DG was going to usurpt that position. We were told that the accusations were patently false and that DG was completely innocent of anything that EK accused
4. PP has recently defended himself by saying he did try to stop DG by getting him to resign from Victory Baptist after it was found that he had sex with women he was counseling. Is your belief that PP protected Gilyard based on PP's failure to stop DG sooner than this?
I don't know that PP has a conscious. After finding out the extent of DG's sexual misconduct over the last couple of days of research, PP was in the cover-up up to his red hair. DG was the rising star and PP's ticket to the big time. PP was power and fame hungry back in those days. He was making himself a name with Judge Pressler reclaiming the SBC for Christ. DG figured prominently in this, I'm sure. See what good conservative schools can turn out...great preachers like DG. Makes me wonder what other skeletons PP has hidden in his own closet. I've never trusted him because he seemed like such a fake person. This probably colors my perceptions, but then again my impressions may have been spot on.
(Deleted more personal info here but she knew DG personally)
DG was working in better men's wear at Dillard’s at that time (while in school).
I know that we stood up and vehemently defended DG against the big bad EK.
Keep me posted to new developments, please. As one who was personally misled, I feel very betrayed and want to see him punished for his sins and crimes. One warming thought is that child sexual predators are the scum of the earth in prison and they are not treated well at all by the other inmates. Prisoners have standards, too, and harming a child is the worst thing one can do and be locked up! ”
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Watch the News Tonight
For those of you that are local, be sure to watch the 11 o'clock news tonight on Channel 47. Dawn Lopez is doing another story on Gilyard. I will post the video on my site later when it becomes available.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Gilyard Still Making Plans!
Darrell still believes he is invincible. He is still talking to people and making plans to move to Gwinnett county (Atlanta, Georgia) to "start a church there". He believes that they need a good Bible believing church there according to sources. While we wait to see if he is ever going to pay for his crimes against children, and immorality involving many women, he is making plans for his next church. He has done this every time he has been caught. He boldly makes plans for his next church as if no one can touch him. And at every church there have been victims, since the 1980's. And some people are still questioning whether or not he has a problem.
This time the legal system is involved, so he has hired one of the best criminal defense attorneys in the State of Florida to defend him. This attorney is known for getting criminals off on technicalities.
Watch out Gwinnett County!!
The hearing is coming up, we will see what our justice system has to say about his plans.
This time the legal system is involved, so he has hired one of the best criminal defense attorneys in the State of Florida to defend him. This attorney is known for getting criminals off on technicalities.
Watch out Gwinnett County!!
The hearing is coming up, we will see what our justice system has to say about his plans.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
See no Evil, Speak no Evil, Hear no Evil? Or is it Denial?
Many people feel that this is a private church matter that should not be talked about, and feel that speaking out is wrong. Some of you feel that it is really sinful and slanderous. Everyone is certainly entitled to their own opinion and needs to listen to their own convictions. I also struggled with this years ago when I found out Darrell Gilyard had moved back to Jacksonville to Pastor Shiloh. I was shocked that he had been allowed to simply move on right after he not only was caught, but also made admissions. Not to mention his long history of the same. I wanted to speak out, I wanted to warn the church, I wanted to confront him directly. I did not know if it was the right thing to do, if it would help, if anyone would listen, then the question of maybe he had gotten help (I doubted this, but there was a possibility). So, I kept quiet. I would think about it occasionally, see him on TV, someone mention his church, someone mention the past, or just a trigger memory of that horrible time. Then a couple of years ago, I heard that he had more victims that were remaining quiet or had been paid off to keep quiet. I heard he had been confronted along with the some of the Deacons and even that many people were notified of his behavior with women and girls. No one seemed interested in dealing with the problem, and this was current stuff, mine was "old news". Coming out publicly is very scary. You get attacked and few believe you, most accuse you of lying or being vindictive, and you have to relive it all again also. But, I also figured if all of these people have not listened all of these years and he was not kept from pastoring again with everything that happened, how is my one small voice going to change anything?
Well, it took one "small voice" of the current victim's to give me the courage and opportunity to speak and now many others are gaining the same strength little by little. One voice does make a difference! It is painful and hurtful, but it is worth it if it saves even a few from being hurt by him.
I would like to pass along some information that I was not even aware of until all of this happened. I did not know how huge this problem is until now. I never would have guessed that this is more of an epidemic than a rare problem. I am speaking of sick men being allowed to do horrible things to women/girls in their ministry while they are wearing the disguise of Pastor. Then after a victim gets the courage to stand up and tell someone in the church (or confront the perpetrator directly) and they are told "we will handle it" and they watch the Pastor leave the church and move on. No real accountability for him, wouldn't want to embarrass anyone or cause a "bad light" on the church, tell the victim to keep quiet, then offer no counsel or help to the victim. Next thing you know, Pastor is at another church and usually victimizes again. Ditto all over again, then another church and more victims, only given more power now because he has been allowed to get away before. Then when people finally rise up and say "when is it enough? Nothings being done, let's expose this and stop him" then people are outraged that you are speaking against a Pastor, you are the sinful one who is shaming God. The silence is the problem, it is what gives them power! We are not talking about a Pastor who has made a bad decision and has fallen in some way, we are talking about exposing repeat offenders.
Please look at the problem from a real world view as I have recently done. See the following links. See how you feel about silence after you really see the full spectrum of the problem. I personally do not feel God would tell us to turn our heads to this problem.
Survivor Stories:
http://stopbaptistpredators.org/survivor_stories.html
Actual Numbers:
http://stopbaptistpredators.org/alarmingnumbers.html
National News story:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17265721/
Request for Help:
http://www.ethicsdaily.com/article_detail.cfm?AID=9469
Well, it took one "small voice" of the current victim's to give me the courage and opportunity to speak and now many others are gaining the same strength little by little. One voice does make a difference! It is painful and hurtful, but it is worth it if it saves even a few from being hurt by him.
I would like to pass along some information that I was not even aware of until all of this happened. I did not know how huge this problem is until now. I never would have guessed that this is more of an epidemic than a rare problem. I am speaking of sick men being allowed to do horrible things to women/girls in their ministry while they are wearing the disguise of Pastor. Then after a victim gets the courage to stand up and tell someone in the church (or confront the perpetrator directly) and they are told "we will handle it" and they watch the Pastor leave the church and move on. No real accountability for him, wouldn't want to embarrass anyone or cause a "bad light" on the church, tell the victim to keep quiet, then offer no counsel or help to the victim. Next thing you know, Pastor is at another church and usually victimizes again. Ditto all over again, then another church and more victims, only given more power now because he has been allowed to get away before. Then when people finally rise up and say "when is it enough? Nothings being done, let's expose this and stop him" then people are outraged that you are speaking against a Pastor, you are the sinful one who is shaming God. The silence is the problem, it is what gives them power! We are not talking about a Pastor who has made a bad decision and has fallen in some way, we are talking about exposing repeat offenders.
Please look at the problem from a real world view as I have recently done. See the following links. See how you feel about silence after you really see the full spectrum of the problem. I personally do not feel God would tell us to turn our heads to this problem.
Survivor Stories:
http://stopbaptistpredators.org/survivor_stories.html
Actual Numbers:
http://stopbaptistpredators.org/alarmingnumbers.html
National News story:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17265721/
Request for Help:
http://www.ethicsdaily.com/article_detail.cfm?AID=9469
Monday, January 21, 2008
Where do we go from here?
What amazes me at this point are the sheer number of lives damaged here. How many people have really been damaged by these sins? How many lives have been changed and families broken? How many people this trickles down and has a negative effect on.
I am saddened that some people struggle with this in a way that makes them question whether they will ever attend church again. I am also saddened by the thought of the lost world saying "look at those church people, that's why I don't have anything to do with church."
I feel it is better if we allow the sin to be dealt with and exposed rather than covering it up, especially to the lost world. It also sends a better message that it will not be tolerated in the church. It lets the victims know that they do not stand alone and shouldn't just "deal with it" as they watch the perpetrator walk away to another church. That almost tells the victim they are not important and that no one cares about their pain.
But we do care! That is what prompted me to write this particular post. How do we show the people destroyed by this that they matter? That they have cheerleaders wanting them to recover and do more than "learn to live with the pain." Not just talk about the problem, but do something to make it better somehow. How do we tell the lost readers that this should not keep them from seeking God? That this is about the corruptness of man and his choices to sin against God? That most churches would not cover this sin up, and most churches would not call a man to Pastor that had a blemish on his charachter?
I posted recently asking you to encourage the victims and only one person posted. I know many of you are praying for them. Let's take a moment to tell them that we care about them and their recovery? Tell them how brave they are and how sorry we are that they have suffered. Let's show Christ like love to them.
They need encouragement right now as they wait. Let's do something to show them we care and help them begin to heal. This post isn't about Gilyard or the church or the scandal, this is about love in action.
I am saddened that some people struggle with this in a way that makes them question whether they will ever attend church again. I am also saddened by the thought of the lost world saying "look at those church people, that's why I don't have anything to do with church."
I feel it is better if we allow the sin to be dealt with and exposed rather than covering it up, especially to the lost world. It also sends a better message that it will not be tolerated in the church. It lets the victims know that they do not stand alone and shouldn't just "deal with it" as they watch the perpetrator walk away to another church. That almost tells the victim they are not important and that no one cares about their pain.
But we do care! That is what prompted me to write this particular post. How do we show the people destroyed by this that they matter? That they have cheerleaders wanting them to recover and do more than "learn to live with the pain." Not just talk about the problem, but do something to make it better somehow. How do we tell the lost readers that this should not keep them from seeking God? That this is about the corruptness of man and his choices to sin against God? That most churches would not cover this sin up, and most churches would not call a man to Pastor that had a blemish on his charachter?
I posted recently asking you to encourage the victims and only one person posted. I know many of you are praying for them. Let's take a moment to tell them that we care about them and their recovery? Tell them how brave they are and how sorry we are that they have suffered. Let's show Christ like love to them.
They need encouragement right now as they wait. Let's do something to show them we care and help them begin to heal. This post isn't about Gilyard or the church or the scandal, this is about love in action.
Please note any negative comments or attacks on the victims under this post will be deleted.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
David vs. Goliath
The Detectives and the State's Attorneys office are doing their jobs well. They are working tirelessly and have now made the arrest. The media is staying on top of the story and doing a great job of keeping the focus on Darrell and not on the church. Many feared it would become a slam on the church. The victims are being brave as they have told their stories. Prayer warriors are praying for justice, for repentance, for the healing of the victims and the families many involved. Many people have come forward sharing their knowledge of events that have been covered up these last years at Shiloh. Many people are not willing to remain silent anymore.
I am so thankful for all of you!!!! Thank you for standing up and deciding to put an end to this.
Many of you have shared your concerns about his attorney trying to get him a plea bargain and light sentence. Well, we can help with that. Please understand, although the arrest has been made, there is still a need for more of you to tell your stories. Not just victims, but stories that have bothered you (or sickened) regarding relationships that he was having or women he tried to seduce, even if it is something you knew happened and weren't a part of directly. It is time to expose it. The fear is that you may have to testify - remember, he may plea out and never face the court. This is even more likely if there are tons of accounts, he won't want all of it to come out. This will also give the investigators more to go on. Even one story is important, and then they all begin to come together.
If you have any information, you can call the State's Attorneys' office 630-2490 ask for Julie Sachs voicemail and leave the information there, or you can email me at thefamilycircus5@comcast.net and I will forward the email to the SA.
Thank you for your help and to those of you who have already shared so much!
I am so thankful for all of you!!!! Thank you for standing up and deciding to put an end to this.
Many of you have shared your concerns about his attorney trying to get him a plea bargain and light sentence. Well, we can help with that. Please understand, although the arrest has been made, there is still a need for more of you to tell your stories. Not just victims, but stories that have bothered you (or sickened) regarding relationships that he was having or women he tried to seduce, even if it is something you knew happened and weren't a part of directly. It is time to expose it. The fear is that you may have to testify - remember, he may plea out and never face the court. This is even more likely if there are tons of accounts, he won't want all of it to come out. This will also give the investigators more to go on. Even one story is important, and then they all begin to come together.
If you have any information, you can call the State's Attorneys' office 630-2490 ask for Julie Sachs voicemail and leave the information there, or you can email me at thefamilycircus5@comcast.net and I will forward the email to the SA.
Thank you for your help and to those of you who have already shared so much!
Monday, January 14, 2008
Arrest Made!!!!
Many people have talked this afternoon of an arrest of Gilyard today. I have confirmed per First Coast News (Channel 12), Fox News 30 and News 4 Jax (Channel 4) at this time that Darrell was arrested today. His attorney asked if he could bring him in, and he did. This is why you will hear that he turned himself in. The charge is lewd and lascivious against a minor. He has already been released on $5000 bond.
Now, I am sure this is just the beginning and it will be enough to keep him in Jax. until they form the rest of the case and more charges. So keep watching.
Also, I have been told to watch Channel 12 news tonight at 11 p.m. for an interview with Paige Patterson and more on this arrest. Watch this interview with an open mind and heart. I have communicated with him and he has shed some new light on all of this. You and I may have a new perspective as this all comes to light.
It's all coming together, keep praying.
Now, I am sure this is just the beginning and it will be enough to keep him in Jax. until they form the rest of the case and more charges. So keep watching.
Also, I have been told to watch Channel 12 news tonight at 11 p.m. for an interview with Paige Patterson and more on this arrest. Watch this interview with an open mind and heart. I have communicated with him and he has shed some new light on all of this. You and I may have a new perspective as this all comes to light.
It's all coming together, keep praying.
Encourage the Victims Here
There are many brave people involved here and I am so proud of them all. There are many things that may never be made public, but please know that the current victims are courageous and strong and that they love the Lord and seek His blessing, and accountability, not vengeance. Please send comments of encouragement to them on this site. That would mean so much to them through this process and will help to give them strength and courage for each day ahead.
So, during this time of waiting, please use it to encourage the victims. Pray for them and for the investigators, for the families involved and for the others involved that are coming forward with past information, and pray for those who are struggling with this disappointment with feeling let down. Please keep your eyes focused on God and don't let man ruin your faith. Thank you for your time.
So, during this time of waiting, please use it to encourage the victims. Pray for them and for the investigators, for the families involved and for the others involved that are coming forward with past information, and pray for those who are struggling with this disappointment with feeling let down. Please keep your eyes focused on God and don't let man ruin your faith. Thank you for your time.
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Paige Patterson and Dr. Vines
I am going to shock many of you with what I am about to say. But I feel it is the right thing to do. When this is over, I want to walk away from this knowing I did everything the Lord prompted me to do. And that I, in love, not only confronted the sin, but also defended when appropriate. We are not supposed to cast judgement without all of the facts. With DG, there are more than enough facts and allegations (a 20 year background), and biblically I Tim. 5:19-20 says, "Do not entertain an accusation against an elder unless it is brought by two or three witnesses. Those who sin are to be rebuked publicly, so that the others may take warning." This is talking about elders sin."
Now, my point. There are many things being said about Paige Patterson and Dr. Vines. I have my own personal feelings about what did and did not happen in the past, and even now. However, to blast them on this or any other site only based on what we are being told by the media and the past allegations of cover up, would be wrong. I Tim. 6:11-12,20-21 says, "...pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of faith. Turn away from godless chatter and the opposing ideas of what is falsely called knowledge...Grace be with you." What we feel was cover up, and what we are reading (I am guilty of this too) is in effect godless chatter and false knowledge. We really don't know what either man said or did outside of what is being reported to us. I know that I wish they had done more at that time and even now (making a statement admitting mistakes) but, we have to remember they may be wishing they had done more, they have to live with that knowledge every day. And no matter what they say publicly right now it can be misconstrued and taken out of context. I do fully believe they were in over their heads with DG back then, and I truly believe they did not know how to properly handle it. They made mistakes, but don't we all? Every day.
I am not defending them fully, but I have had a heart check and as I pray for the purifying of my heart and the correct motives, I must speak this truth out loud especially with so many of you reading and responding. I do not want to be responsible for passing judgement on these men. We know who the real criminal is here.
I do not believe either of these men condoned the behavior of DG, nor did they feel what he did was o.k. If they did, there would have never been an inquiry in 1991 - and I know personally they pursued all of the allegations that were brought to them in June 1991. I can't answer for any of the other times. I know Dr. Vines was sick over it and shocked. I met and talked with him during that time. I am sure they have regrets. If there were allegations overlooked and dismissed by Patterson, he and the victims and the Lord know it.
Do we really know that they did not warn the churches? No we do not. Do we know why Dr. Vines later spoke in DG's church? No, we can only speculate. Do we know why they have chosen not to apologize publicly for making some of these mistakes? No, although we are waiting and it would make us feel better. Should DG have ever had the ability to speak in a pulpit again? Absolutely not, and both of these men told him this to his face, and Paige Patterson stripped him of his seminary license to preach (whatever it is titled) he went on to preach without the license of a Pastor. And the last time DG contacted Patterson (one year ago), he again told him he washed his hands of him and because of his past and his divorce, he biblically was not worthy of Pastoring and he would not talk to him again. And Dr. Vines did not speak with him or associate with him for a number of years until DG came to him and lied saying he had completed treatment for sexual addiction and asked for his forgiveness, Dr. Vines extended him forgiveness but also told him he still should not preach. I know he later spoke in his church, he knows this was a poor choice. But we do not know the full story.
To crucify these two men over the sins and problems of DG would serve no purpose. To challenge these men to stand up now and humbly admit mistakes and ask for forgiveness is, I believe, totally appropriate, especially as they are leaders and called to a high standard. And what I would like to see is for them to now step up and help put an end to this problem within the church.
They cannot stop sin, but we need a system where sexual predators go on the books (especially after more than one allegation) some kind of record accessible by all churches to check before hiring Pastors or other staff. It is not enough to do criminal background checks because many times victims do no more than confront the church, so there is no public record. We need a system available to churches nationwide that prevents this. I know several people have asked for this for years (primarily I know Christa Brown has made this her mission) isn't it time now to make this happen. Such a simple thing really. Who better than two prominent voices like Paige Patterson and Dr. Vines? I am told there is a record within the SBC but it is private and only used by them. That does not help the churches! We cannot stop all of the predators, but what if it were a substantial number? DG would have never made it to Victory or Shiloh or FBC for that matter if this had been in place tears ago. Think of all of the victims who would have been saved - at least 50. That is a shame. That is the REAL issue here. Let's stop this abuse. Let God hold them accountable for their sins, but let's not partake in it by turning our heads. And let's not further the sin by tearing each other apart. I am preaching at myself here to. Christ loved the sinner but hated the sin. Let's focus on the sin and put the devil on the defense He wants this sin to destroy God's house and the families within. Let's make a strong circle in the name of Jesus and make the devil flee. He can only have the power over us that we allow, "Resist the devil and he will flee from you." DG was an impostor among us, he was falsely shepherding for his own gain. We need real men of God shepherding. Let's all allow God to make some good out of this, shall we? Who is with me on this? I think it is time for God to be glorified by us all doing the right thing. Thank you for your time as I rambled on, I cannot believe the time - I have chosen every word carefully and had to wait until the house was quiet to think clearly.
Now, my point. There are many things being said about Paige Patterson and Dr. Vines. I have my own personal feelings about what did and did not happen in the past, and even now. However, to blast them on this or any other site only based on what we are being told by the media and the past allegations of cover up, would be wrong. I Tim. 6:11-12,20-21 says, "...pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of faith. Turn away from godless chatter and the opposing ideas of what is falsely called knowledge...Grace be with you." What we feel was cover up, and what we are reading (I am guilty of this too) is in effect godless chatter and false knowledge. We really don't know what either man said or did outside of what is being reported to us. I know that I wish they had done more at that time and even now (making a statement admitting mistakes) but, we have to remember they may be wishing they had done more, they have to live with that knowledge every day. And no matter what they say publicly right now it can be misconstrued and taken out of context. I do fully believe they were in over their heads with DG back then, and I truly believe they did not know how to properly handle it. They made mistakes, but don't we all? Every day.
I am not defending them fully, but I have had a heart check and as I pray for the purifying of my heart and the correct motives, I must speak this truth out loud especially with so many of you reading and responding. I do not want to be responsible for passing judgement on these men. We know who the real criminal is here.
I do not believe either of these men condoned the behavior of DG, nor did they feel what he did was o.k. If they did, there would have never been an inquiry in 1991 - and I know personally they pursued all of the allegations that were brought to them in June 1991. I can't answer for any of the other times. I know Dr. Vines was sick over it and shocked. I met and talked with him during that time. I am sure they have regrets. If there were allegations overlooked and dismissed by Patterson, he and the victims and the Lord know it.
Do we really know that they did not warn the churches? No we do not. Do we know why Dr. Vines later spoke in DG's church? No, we can only speculate. Do we know why they have chosen not to apologize publicly for making some of these mistakes? No, although we are waiting and it would make us feel better. Should DG have ever had the ability to speak in a pulpit again? Absolutely not, and both of these men told him this to his face, and Paige Patterson stripped him of his seminary license to preach (whatever it is titled) he went on to preach without the license of a Pastor. And the last time DG contacted Patterson (one year ago), he again told him he washed his hands of him and because of his past and his divorce, he biblically was not worthy of Pastoring and he would not talk to him again. And Dr. Vines did not speak with him or associate with him for a number of years until DG came to him and lied saying he had completed treatment for sexual addiction and asked for his forgiveness, Dr. Vines extended him forgiveness but also told him he still should not preach. I know he later spoke in his church, he knows this was a poor choice. But we do not know the full story.
To crucify these two men over the sins and problems of DG would serve no purpose. To challenge these men to stand up now and humbly admit mistakes and ask for forgiveness is, I believe, totally appropriate, especially as they are leaders and called to a high standard. And what I would like to see is for them to now step up and help put an end to this problem within the church.
They cannot stop sin, but we need a system where sexual predators go on the books (especially after more than one allegation) some kind of record accessible by all churches to check before hiring Pastors or other staff. It is not enough to do criminal background checks because many times victims do no more than confront the church, so there is no public record. We need a system available to churches nationwide that prevents this. I know several people have asked for this for years (primarily I know Christa Brown has made this her mission) isn't it time now to make this happen. Such a simple thing really. Who better than two prominent voices like Paige Patterson and Dr. Vines? I am told there is a record within the SBC but it is private and only used by them. That does not help the churches! We cannot stop all of the predators, but what if it were a substantial number? DG would have never made it to Victory or Shiloh or FBC for that matter if this had been in place tears ago. Think of all of the victims who would have been saved - at least 50. That is a shame. That is the REAL issue here. Let's stop this abuse. Let God hold them accountable for their sins, but let's not partake in it by turning our heads. And let's not further the sin by tearing each other apart. I am preaching at myself here to. Christ loved the sinner but hated the sin. Let's focus on the sin and put the devil on the defense He wants this sin to destroy God's house and the families within. Let's make a strong circle in the name of Jesus and make the devil flee. He can only have the power over us that we allow, "Resist the devil and he will flee from you." DG was an impostor among us, he was falsely shepherding for his own gain. We need real men of God shepherding. Let's all allow God to make some good out of this, shall we? Who is with me on this? I think it is time for God to be glorified by us all doing the right thing. Thank you for your time as I rambled on, I cannot believe the time - I have chosen every word carefully and had to wait until the house was quiet to think clearly.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Don't Be Afraid Anymore
I know of several people who have been courageous with their stories and are a little intimidated about the thought of speaking out in front of the State Attorney and a court room. I know you feel a little scared at the thought of facing Darrell Gilyard again and others who may be there. I know you are worried about your name and your story being known. It is one thing to tell case workers or detectives in one quiet meeting or even telling me in a personal email or phone call. It is much bigger to tell it publicly in a court. I know their are those of you who feel you and your family will be embarrassed and I understand, fully, what you mean. It is difficult to expose the truth when it is this ugly. It is embarrassing, you do at times feel it would be easier to remain silent and just let it go away. But the thing is, it never goes away, not completely. You (I hope) will learn to forgive, but only God is capable of forgetting. It will creep up when you least expect it and it does show up in your life in different ways. Even if you do not allow it to become a focus, it is there.
What I am trying to say is, it is much better to face it, to purge it, to boldly confront it than to try to bury it or remain in bondage by the fear of coming out. You will not be embarrassed unless you allow yourself to be. You were not looking for this, you did not welcome the predator. No matter what you may have even consented to happen, you were still victimized by a respected figure you were supposed to trust. That is a violation and the only one who should carry shame is him. Shame is also a form of bondage and the devil can use that to keep you from all that God has planned for you - and trust me dear friend, He still has BIG plans. You may be able to help someone else down the road that you would otherwise have been unable to help, but with a shared story, there is much compassion and healing. I know from experience. I (after my 1991 incident) went on the following year to work at a Children's Home for troubled and abused children. I had the time of my life there helping others deal with their trauma and healing from physical and sexual abuse from people that they respected and loved. They had the choice to let it negatively affect their lives (some did) or to stand up, and work through it and forgive and to allow God to "work it all for good" because He loves us so. You may think "Why did God allow this?" well, there is this thing called free will, he allows us to sin and make our own choices (your predator made his choice to violate God's and man's law) unfortunately, you were the victim. But God's arms are WIDE open my friend, ready to heal, ready to make Beauty from the ashes. But it is all up to you ,there's that free will thing again : } you have to allow Him to be your strength, you have to welcome Him in to heal and direct you. And you have to expose the truth. You cannot fully heal unless you do, trust me. I have healed all over again during these last few weeks, it does not get any better than allowing God to take something that man meant for harm and let Him (the Great Healer) make it for good.
Please, be courageous (you already are a survivor) don't be silent or afraid, please don't allow your silence to cover his sin. To many people have already, and now there are more victims, I have to live with that also. But, I have seen His hand moving here and I have (with many others) covered this in prayer and I believe He is exposing it all at this time because it is time. I believe God is walking with us right now more than ever. I've seen so much happen this week that you cannot deny His hand at work! So, you pray about it and I know He will walk with you all the way through the process, all the way through what you are now fearing. He will give you strength. He never gives us more than we can bear, he must know you are really strong. Come and join us, let's glorify the Father and put and end to this deceiver. I am proud of you and many others are proud of you as well. The majority of the emails I receive are encouragement and love. It's not as bad as you think. Those that come against you or talk negatively, they are not friends, and they would turn on anyone. Be true to yourself, make your family and friends proud by showing what strength lays underneath those wounds. Then let the Lord be glorified by healing those wounds and using it for good. He is who we serve, not man, not evil.
I love you my fellow victims and warriors!! I know you can do it! I believe in you and I will stand with you. When this is all over, and we are allowed to communicate, we can have a survivors celebration dinner together - how does that sound?
What I am trying to say is, it is much better to face it, to purge it, to boldly confront it than to try to bury it or remain in bondage by the fear of coming out. You will not be embarrassed unless you allow yourself to be. You were not looking for this, you did not welcome the predator. No matter what you may have even consented to happen, you were still victimized by a respected figure you were supposed to trust. That is a violation and the only one who should carry shame is him. Shame is also a form of bondage and the devil can use that to keep you from all that God has planned for you - and trust me dear friend, He still has BIG plans. You may be able to help someone else down the road that you would otherwise have been unable to help, but with a shared story, there is much compassion and healing. I know from experience. I (after my 1991 incident) went on the following year to work at a Children's Home for troubled and abused children. I had the time of my life there helping others deal with their trauma and healing from physical and sexual abuse from people that they respected and loved. They had the choice to let it negatively affect their lives (some did) or to stand up, and work through it and forgive and to allow God to "work it all for good" because He loves us so. You may think "Why did God allow this?" well, there is this thing called free will, he allows us to sin and make our own choices (your predator made his choice to violate God's and man's law) unfortunately, you were the victim. But God's arms are WIDE open my friend, ready to heal, ready to make Beauty from the ashes. But it is all up to you ,there's that free will thing again : } you have to allow Him to be your strength, you have to welcome Him in to heal and direct you. And you have to expose the truth. You cannot fully heal unless you do, trust me. I have healed all over again during these last few weeks, it does not get any better than allowing God to take something that man meant for harm and let Him (the Great Healer) make it for good.
Please, be courageous (you already are a survivor) don't be silent or afraid, please don't allow your silence to cover his sin. To many people have already, and now there are more victims, I have to live with that also. But, I have seen His hand moving here and I have (with many others) covered this in prayer and I believe He is exposing it all at this time because it is time. I believe God is walking with us right now more than ever. I've seen so much happen this week that you cannot deny His hand at work! So, you pray about it and I know He will walk with you all the way through the process, all the way through what you are now fearing. He will give you strength. He never gives us more than we can bear, he must know you are really strong. Come and join us, let's glorify the Father and put and end to this deceiver. I am proud of you and many others are proud of you as well. The majority of the emails I receive are encouragement and love. It's not as bad as you think. Those that come against you or talk negatively, they are not friends, and they would turn on anyone. Be true to yourself, make your family and friends proud by showing what strength lays underneath those wounds. Then let the Lord be glorified by healing those wounds and using it for good. He is who we serve, not man, not evil.
I love you my fellow victims and warriors!! I know you can do it! I believe in you and I will stand with you. When this is all over, and we are allowed to communicate, we can have a survivors celebration dinner together - how does that sound?
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Shiloh Metropolitan Baptist Church
To all of you from Shiloh:
I see so many blogs from members there who are hurting.
I want you to know that I feel you have been victimized to. You are supposed to love and respect your Pastor and learn from Him. Of course you feel sad and angry and defensive and many mixed feelings. There were people who knew about Gilyards past and allowed him to come there and shepherd you anyway, but, not everyone knew of his past. Now, you need to pray for healing for your hearts and souls (as many of us are for you) as you will have to heal as well. There are MANY VICTIMS here, not just those he harassed, but those of you who loved him as your Pastor. He is a phenomenal speaker of the Word and God's word does not return back void. So even in the midst of sin, God's word was still speaking to His sheep. I pray that you will not allow your hearts to become bitter and that you will not let this turn you away from the church. Let God heal you (He is who we look to, not to man) and let Him turn these ashes into Beauty!!!!Bless you!
I see so many blogs from members there who are hurting.
I want you to know that I feel you have been victimized to. You are supposed to love and respect your Pastor and learn from Him. Of course you feel sad and angry and defensive and many mixed feelings. There were people who knew about Gilyards past and allowed him to come there and shepherd you anyway, but, not everyone knew of his past. Now, you need to pray for healing for your hearts and souls (as many of us are for you) as you will have to heal as well. There are MANY VICTIMS here, not just those he harassed, but those of you who loved him as your Pastor. He is a phenomenal speaker of the Word and God's word does not return back void. So even in the midst of sin, God's word was still speaking to His sheep. I pray that you will not allow your hearts to become bitter and that you will not let this turn you away from the church. Let God heal you (He is who we look to, not to man) and let Him turn these ashes into Beauty!!!!Bless you!
Monday, January 7, 2008
Gilyard Resigns!!!!!
Updated interviews late tonight and all day tomorrow, I will add the links as soon as they become available.
Jacksonville News Stations CBS47, First Coast News, Fox 30 and News 4 Jax confirm the resignation of Gilyard.
See his Resignation Letter here. So where's he headed too next? Looks like Atlanta.
Jacksonville News Stations CBS47, First Coast News, Fox 30 and News 4 Jax confirm the resignation of Gilyard.
See his Resignation Letter here. So where's he headed too next? Looks like Atlanta.
Upcoming News Tonight
I just received word that there will be new reports on CBS 47 News and First Coast News tonight. So please be watching. You will be shocked at what the news will be, it is worth watching. (1/7/08 Monday)
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Will you stand with me?
If any of you are afraid of being known, it can be anonymous. You can contact me privately at my personal e-mail. thefamilycircus8@gmail.com You can also call the sex crimes hotline and remain anonymous (the detective said they will only take your personal info. if you are willing and no one will come to your home, etc.)
(904) 630-2168
JSOSexcrimes@jaxsheriff.org
You can call with just tips or leads - if that is all you have, it is still worthwhile.
I know it can be intimidating, there is no need to expose you as a victim, we just need your testimony. No one outside the investigative team has to know.
Thank you.
(904) 630-2168
JSOSexcrimes@jaxsheriff.org
You can call with just tips or leads - if that is all you have, it is still worthwhile.
I know it can be intimidating, there is no need to expose you as a victim, we just need your testimony. No one outside the investigative team has to know.
Thank you.
Friday, January 4, 2008
sins of a pastor
This blog is about the sexual improprieties involving Pastor Darrell Gilyard of Shiloh Metropolitan Baptist church in Jacksonville, Florida and his long history of the same problems in other churches since atleast 1991.
What I am about to write about is not vengeance, it is not from a spirit of hatred or judgement. I truly wish this person had gotten help and would stop his behaviors. But the truth is, he has not. He is a predator and he misuses his standing as a pastor. I have hoped for the last 17 years that he had changed and repented. But, sadly, he has not. Because of this there are more victims, and probably more to come.
We can only stop him if we all stand up together and say, "It is enough."
Most of the time when these things come to light, people sit at home thinking, why hasn't someone done something? Well, I am. It is past time.
I have a personal testimony of this man preying on me as an 18 year old. I left the matter in the churches hands as did all of the other girls and women who came forward at that time. We truly thought he would never preach again based on all of the sexual improrieties against him. He targets and preys on women and young girls - especially those who may be slightly vulnerable and seeking counsel from him. He uses this time to find there weaknesses and to make them feel as if they can trust him (as their Pastor) then he begins to come on to them and has been repeatedly accused of rape. Some women and girls have "consented" to a physical relationship. But, in his position this is in no way alright! No matter what he convinced them, they are still VICTIMS! He had asked me to come to Texas to be on staff at his church, he used this to get closer to me. I trusted and looked up to him as a Spiritual Leader. I was blessed to get away from him the night he tried to get me to go to his hotel room. I literally ran away from him. He ran after me and was not apologetic or remorseful when confronted later.
I know there are more women and girls (other than the two girls who have bravely recently come forward) who have been victimized by him. Even if you feel it was only innappropriate conversation, messages, letters, e mails, text messages, he has done all of these things. Some of these things happened with me in 1991.
IT IS WRONG NO MATTER WHAT! HE IS IN A LEADERSHIP POSITION AND IT IS TIME SOMEONE SPEAK OUT AND STOP HIM.
Church leaders: Isn't it time to say you no longer qualify for a ministry position?
Step up to the plate. You as Pastors will have to answer to the Lord for not protecting the innocent. He will face enough judgement from the Lord when his time comes, but what about the girls and women he damages in the process.
One brave soul, Pastor George Harvey Jr. stepped up to the plate to try to warn the church - they overlooked his information. They should be held accountable. But one voice is not enough, we need more Godly men to step up and say, you have had your chance to repent and change - no more.
Will you join us in standing up for ourselves and making him stop? Please do not be intimidated. We will all stand together and support each other and in numbers, he cannot make this go away again. In 1991 there were not enough willing to stand up and testify, although there were many with stories, it never left the Pastors Committee investigating and some went to the media.
This time they need BRAVE women to step up. All we need is your testimony. You may even be able to remain anonymous. We just need to know how many more are afraid to tell.
17 years have gone by, for me, in which I knew he was still victimizing and there was nothing I could do. Please don't find yourself sitting back and watching it happen to someone else and live with the guilt of not stepping up with us.
He has been forced to leave 4 different churches due to sexual improprities, several of which he admitted to, and he is now Pastoring a mega church. There are two minor aged girls who have just come forward. I decided it was time to rise up with them. Will you answer the call?
I have prayed for guidance and wisdom. I truly pray he will get real help and repent. If he had already done that, I would not be doing this. But, I can not sit back and let it happen again and again. He has taken a PAID leave of absence from the church while it is being investigated. If this was the first allegation against him, that would be one thing. But it is at every church he pastors dating all the way back to 1987 and even many churches he has just been a guest speaker in the past. That is some coincidence. He is a phenominal Preacher, many souls have been saved due to his messages, but the sins going on behind that facade are the issue.
I feel for his family, his current wife, his two children. But, they have been through this with him many times before. He has victimized his family also by putting them through this. But, I believe he is ill. I believe that God can help him, but he has to be repentant first.
WILL YOU STEP UP TO THE PLATE?????
Please Pray about it!
Tiffany
What I am about to write about is not vengeance, it is not from a spirit of hatred or judgement. I truly wish this person had gotten help and would stop his behaviors. But the truth is, he has not. He is a predator and he misuses his standing as a pastor. I have hoped for the last 17 years that he had changed and repented. But, sadly, he has not. Because of this there are more victims, and probably more to come.
We can only stop him if we all stand up together and say, "It is enough."
Most of the time when these things come to light, people sit at home thinking, why hasn't someone done something? Well, I am. It is past time.
I have a personal testimony of this man preying on me as an 18 year old. I left the matter in the churches hands as did all of the other girls and women who came forward at that time. We truly thought he would never preach again based on all of the sexual improrieties against him. He targets and preys on women and young girls - especially those who may be slightly vulnerable and seeking counsel from him. He uses this time to find there weaknesses and to make them feel as if they can trust him (as their Pastor) then he begins to come on to them and has been repeatedly accused of rape. Some women and girls have "consented" to a physical relationship. But, in his position this is in no way alright! No matter what he convinced them, they are still VICTIMS! He had asked me to come to Texas to be on staff at his church, he used this to get closer to me. I trusted and looked up to him as a Spiritual Leader. I was blessed to get away from him the night he tried to get me to go to his hotel room. I literally ran away from him. He ran after me and was not apologetic or remorseful when confronted later.
I know there are more women and girls (other than the two girls who have bravely recently come forward) who have been victimized by him. Even if you feel it was only innappropriate conversation, messages, letters, e mails, text messages, he has done all of these things. Some of these things happened with me in 1991.
IT IS WRONG NO MATTER WHAT! HE IS IN A LEADERSHIP POSITION AND IT IS TIME SOMEONE SPEAK OUT AND STOP HIM.
Church leaders: Isn't it time to say you no longer qualify for a ministry position?
Step up to the plate. You as Pastors will have to answer to the Lord for not protecting the innocent. He will face enough judgement from the Lord when his time comes, but what about the girls and women he damages in the process.
One brave soul, Pastor George Harvey Jr. stepped up to the plate to try to warn the church - they overlooked his information. They should be held accountable. But one voice is not enough, we need more Godly men to step up and say, you have had your chance to repent and change - no more.
Will you join us in standing up for ourselves and making him stop? Please do not be intimidated. We will all stand together and support each other and in numbers, he cannot make this go away again. In 1991 there were not enough willing to stand up and testify, although there were many with stories, it never left the Pastors Committee investigating and some went to the media.
This time they need BRAVE women to step up. All we need is your testimony. You may even be able to remain anonymous. We just need to know how many more are afraid to tell.
17 years have gone by, for me, in which I knew he was still victimizing and there was nothing I could do. Please don't find yourself sitting back and watching it happen to someone else and live with the guilt of not stepping up with us.
He has been forced to leave 4 different churches due to sexual improprities, several of which he admitted to, and he is now Pastoring a mega church. There are two minor aged girls who have just come forward. I decided it was time to rise up with them. Will you answer the call?
I have prayed for guidance and wisdom. I truly pray he will get real help and repent. If he had already done that, I would not be doing this. But, I can not sit back and let it happen again and again. He has taken a PAID leave of absence from the church while it is being investigated. If this was the first allegation against him, that would be one thing. But it is at every church he pastors dating all the way back to 1987 and even many churches he has just been a guest speaker in the past. That is some coincidence. He is a phenominal Preacher, many souls have been saved due to his messages, but the sins going on behind that facade are the issue.
I feel for his family, his current wife, his two children. But, they have been through this with him many times before. He has victimized his family also by putting them through this. But, I believe he is ill. I believe that God can help him, but he has to be repentant first.
WILL YOU STEP UP TO THE PLATE?????
Please Pray about it!
Tiffany
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